Acceptance In Amy Tan's Fish Cheeks

Feeling shame for the way we look, who we are, and where we come from, is betraying the essential being that distinguishes one from all others. To look similar to everyone for the sake of acceptance, is merely an assent to the person’s perceived reality of a situation. Amy Tan’s “Fish Cheeks” clearly explains the difficulty of her own reflexive action to fit in and her perception of how she would need to act, and how she would need to look. These feelings created an internal conflict of both shame for whom she is and pride to her own uniqueness of being Chinese American.
Amy Tan’s “Fish Cheeks” details her struggle to experience acceptance because of her self-perception of who she is and is not. Amy’s interpretation of acceptance by Robert, the minister’s son, would

During this time in Tan’s life, she explains that her perception was tainted by need to achieve acceptance and win the heart of Robert. Amy Tan lost herself because she was so focused on her need to fit it, to be like American girls; a thin American nose, light skin, wearing miniskirts, and having blond hair. Instead of trying so hard to become something or someone that you are not. Although, over time Tan realized that her Chinese heritage made her the unique person she is. Tan also discounted the profound wisdom from her mother who explained that in order to achieve happiness Tan shouldn’t try to change who she is and where she’s from, “you want to be the same as American girls on the outside. But on the inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame” (Tan). Tan realized later in life of her own internal conflict of shame and pride in the uniqueness of her Chinese American