Aspie Narrative

I count my steps in sets of ten. They call me an “Aspie.” Even numbers visually look uneasy, and hence give me an uneasy feeling. They call me an “Aspie.” The appearance of certain patterns makes me itchy,, I am usually unaware that I tend to stare about 45 seconds longer than what is considered polite, social queues have the tendency to go over my head, and I can’t seem to grasp the relevance of small talk. While these are the normalities of my everyday life, they’re apparently not normal. Therefore, they call me an “Aspie.”
Aspie (noun)— a person with Asperger's syndrome (a social and communication disorder that’s associated with certain quirks and tendencies.) I may be labeled an “Aspie”, but I’m not physically or mentally handicapped

Because my social atmosphere shifted often, my oddities remained buried and unnoticed. My freshman year, I began to recognize that I handled social aspects differently than my peers. Emotions prompted anxiety and fear, group settings were overwhelming, and socializing was mentally laborsome. I’ve struggled with my identity because I couldn’t seem to relate to my friends. None of my girlfriends avoid their friends in the halls because they’re irritated by the pointlessness of small talk or hide in dark closets to avoid making eye contact with someone for longer than two point three seconds. I become so fed up with trying to process and communicate my emotions, that I’m struggling, even now, to find a cohesive way to express myself. I face these challenges on a daily basis, however no one is without their trials. While I may have to work harder at some aspects of life than “normal” people, I’ve come to realize that other coveted aspects come naturally to

I believe the word “disorder” is the wrong one to associate with Asperger’s. I once felt alone in my inability to relate, but I’ve come to feel empowered. I’ve come to realize that my abnormalities are not wrong, just different. I’m proud to be a black, female, first generation student with a social “difference” that is well equipped and determined to conquer all that lies ahead. I’ve come to recognize the multitude of possibilities and opportunities that my uniqueness provide—along with my anomolies, I’m gifted with tendencies and talents that people with “Normal Disorder” may