Ahhhhh my poor head. Why that is dammed window open. *look up and out the window* - take a while like waking up The sun is much too high! I should be at work I should be looking over the ships, I need to … oh … no. No, no, no, surely this is just a dream. *pinches arm* I would not have been this stupid, surely. No, god dam it, I didn’t. Ahhhh look at the time. *gets up and walks around in frustration and anger, clenched fists* I am done. I am finished. Never again to hold the respect of even a lowly rat. Nor deserving of it either. I am a dead flower, once so full of life and opportunity and now shrivelled and undesirable For I, the once dashing and desirable Cassio, have shattered my reputation in a single drunken night. I am now no …show more content…
Keeping an eye on my soldiers. But then Iago just started singing and offering me drinks. It would have rude of me to ignore this honest invite into their world. For what soldier would not drink with his comrades. What a joy it was, belonging for the first time. No longer an outsider. Not a Florentine. Not an aloof engineer. Just part of the crew. It was the most amazing feeling belonging. But after that merry time the devil Roderigo came along and enraged me. I am not sure what he said but it must have been awful. To me riled up enough to stab Montano. I really screwed up didn’t I? But despite what happened I’m not sure I could have avoided these events. It wasn’t really my fault. It was my duty to oversee the party, I owed it to Othello to ensure it would not get out of hand, and then Iago convinced me to drink. Of course I would oblige. How could anyone resist. Honest Iago, always looking out for me, anyone would be a fool to ignore his advice. I know I should not have let myself drink but this was just an honest mistake. I should not be blamed for this. That scoundrel Roderigo is to blame, none of this would have happened without him. I am not the drunk and brawler they think I