Day 1
I got lost out in the wilderness. My heart fueled my body with adrenalin, so much that I couldn’t stop shaking. My actions today put everyone in my squad in great danger, and I hate myself for it. We were all so excited for Saturday when we finished up our patrol. All we could think about was those extra hours of sleep that the morning would bring. We were so distracted by this that it all happened so quickly. We were mauled by an enraged mob of infected, there was no other option but for all of us to split up. Thats where I got lost. Now I 'm stuck here writing in this stupid journal! Suspense is what agitates me the most, constantly on the edge of my toes, not knowing whats about to happen. If the worst does happen to them, I don 't think I could live with myself. Telling their families that I killed their loved one
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Not one bit reassuring. My home was visible in the distance but for some reason there was something holding me back. It’s as if when I arrive, everyone is going to be disappointed in me. Angry for what I have done. And I don 't want to feel like that, I didn 't want none of this. Its like this all happened just to stop me from having a good life. But life isnt like its used to be. We’re contained in that prison that we call home. I want to be free, to live my own life and choose how to live it. To have my own identity rather than just a number. Creating something that actually represents myself for who I am, not what I am. I wish it was like the old days, where you could run free and not worry about what 's out there. The days where the infected were just a halloween costume. I wish I could go back to the days like those, where there were no worries. But reality always interferes with my fantasies. I 'm stuck here and there 's no easy way of getting out. Hopefully my friends await me when I arrive, but I shouldn 't get my hopes up. This is a cruel