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Functional Myths And Perceptions Of Families

1289 Words6 Pages

What do we know about the families of the past? It seems we do not know much based on truths. Fed the romanticized versions by the media, we have been inspired to believe in and create a perfect family. However, this romanticization has also created much dysfunction in families and perceptions. The perceptions and expectations we hold onto have the tendency of being subjective due to the myths, as well as cultural ideals we hold as opposed to actual historical knowledge. There are myths about families that can either be functional, or dysfunctional. Functional myths bring people together, while dysfunctional myths are negative and can disrupt the family and their sense of well-being. This can also be correlated to interracial/interethnic families. …show more content…

The belief that we can be autonomous and improve ourselves or our families without external assistance is a dream or nightmare, depending on your view. Self-sufficiency may be a form of survival, especially in families where there is and has been abuse. However, few families can say they are completely self-sufficient, the majority of people require some assistance sometime in their lives. This is evidenced by the support families receive from the government as well as neighbors or other family members. In addition to the projects and programs provided by the federal government, as well as the educational opportunities provided to our children and parents. Considering that self-sufficiency increases isolation and is responsible for many of the disconnections between, individuals, parents, extended family members and others with whom they should have closer relationships and bonds including teachers and advocates.
Recognizing that family self-sufficiency is a false myth, we also need to acknowledge that all today's families need help in raising children. The problem is not so much to reeducate parents but to make available the help they need and to give them enough power so that they can be effective advocates with and coordinators of the other forces that are bringing up their children-Kenneth …show more content…

This sense of perfection is impossible to achieve because each and every family has problems; big or small. Our daily interactions with our family members is our reality while what we would like them to be is our sense of perfection. Television families that depict the handsome father and beautiful mother who have a large beautiful home and are very well off have clouded the image of the real family for many, especially young adults. These expectations for most cannot be met, therefore, contributing to dissatisfaction, dysfunction, and at times conflict.
Functionally Dysfunctional
Myths may help us maintain our emotional balance during any type of crisis situation. Giving us hope and belief in ourselves as well as the possibility for improvement. While dysfunction can disrupt family life with its negative

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Stone writes about three essential functions of family stories– to pass on the family’s standards, to identify family characteristics, and coping strategies. The first of the three functions is the standards of the family since the family act as the “first culture,” teaching people what their family values and their opinions on certain situations like marriage and illness, mental or physical (Stone 384). The second factor is the family’s characteristics and their traits that bind them together, which act as the family member’s confidence boost (384). Furthermore, this boost makes them value themselves more than the next family, so that the family members contently remain together (384). The third factor is influencing how families cope; these “teaching stories” tell each family how to function outside of the family (385).

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If the family members cannot think through their responses to relationship dilemmas, a state of chronic anxiety may be set in place. According to Brown (1999.), the primary goal of family systems therapy is to reduce constant tension by enabling knowledge and awareness of how the emotional system functions; and by improving levels of differentiation, where the aim is to make changes for the self rather than on trying to change others. As per Richardson, Gilleard, Lieberman, and Peeler (1994), The short-term goal is to foster better relationships between family members of the different generations by understanding the family system with its rules and balances of power and to mobilize the system by reconstruing these rules and having the family observe its own

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These three essential functions are argued for their importance by nonfiction author Elizabeth Stone in her book How Our Family Stories Shape Us, and both authors argue for how legacies affect the decisions of the person, significant or not and the how these legacies remain despite the long family history. Gladwell emphasizes what people’s family can do regarding how successful they will be, while Stone emphasizes the decisions made throughout one’s life, without focusing on the result. Both authors highlight how people do not attribute the personalities people possess to their family, but to their individualism, when then cause is from the opposite. Stone’s argument is about how each family’s life experiences told in stories that are passed down from each generation are significant in the family’s norms and mores, characteristic traits, and coping strategies. These functions lead to the core of the person, the first of the three functions is the standards of the family, their norms and morals since our family act as our first culture, teaching people what their family values and their opinions on certain situations like marriage and illness, mental or physical (384).

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