The fictional character to which I most relate is Miles “Pudge” Halter from Looking For Alaska. Miles comes from what he viewed as a boring background. He has a vague yet impelling vision that he wants to seek a “great perhaps”, so he transfers to Culver Creek boarding school starting his junior year in high school. Filled with stories of adventures and fun from his dad’s high school days, Miles is thrust into life at the school. Tending to muse over life, death, and romance, Miles is fascinated with personal quirks. While Miles keeps quiet most of the time, he still finds himself entangled in drama within his friend group. However, Miles faces challenges that many teenagers do not.
When Miles’ friend and main love interest in the story, Alaska Young, dies mysteriously in a car crash, Miles is swept with confusion. He blames himself and others at the school for her death and struggles to grasp the reality that such an important person in his life disappeared so abruptly. Embarking on something of a detective mission, Miles and a few of his friends wrestle with Alaska’s death. The night she was in the car crash, she was drunk and in a mysterious rush. She collided directly with a police car. The concept that Alaska may have taken her own life impacted Miles very strongly.
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When I was 16, my twin brother attempted to take his own life. Although I am blessed to be able to see his living face every day, I know full well how close I was to a situation exactly like in Looking For Alaska. What mistakes did I make? What pushes someone to commit such a terrible act? Dealing with the confusion and emotions that are involved this situation defined me as a person and changed my relationship with my brother forever. Like Miles, I had to forgive myself and my brother in order to move on. My life, along with Miles’, has been a roller coaster of events that ultimately helped me grow into the person I am