Naomi Wolfe's 'Excerpts From Promiscuities'

Since I was a little kid all I’ve ever heard was to stay away from boys. Boys are no good and nothing but trouble. They have bad intentions and are only out for sex. This has had me questioning whether this is true, that men, much different then women, prefer lust to love or if this is all a sexist idea our society has constructed. For this reason and others such as personal experiences that men are much more concerned with sex then I or many of my friends seem to be, I’ve chosen to look into the topic of whether or not gender socialization has an impact on the experiences of love. Whether or not men and women have different ways of showing love and whether or not the old myth that men prefer lust to love is true. I chose this topic

We can see from the beginning that Wolfe is much more focused one explaining the emotional side of her experience while “Myths of Male Sexuality” was clearly much more concern with discussing the physical aspects of sex. This right away gives us the impression that perhaps men and women look at sex much differently from the beginning. Wolfe explains that was lacked from her experience was the desire, the feeling of not being able to keep their hands off each other. She continues on page 141, that because she was socially seen as emotional rather then men who are physical, and that because her impulses were not as noticeable she felt pressured as a female to control not only her own impulses but a men’s’ as well. Personally I know from experience that many women would prefer there to be an emotional connection before sex, where as man are perfectly fine with a physical attraction before sex. While we can not say that this is the case for every man or women, after taking my own personal experiences into consideration and asking friends it was clear to me that many men were fine with there being no emotional attraction and even didn’t want one. Whereas women felt like there should be an emotional attraction before sex. This can easily be connecting to our reading in class, UCSF’s Oxytocin: The Hormone of Love and our discussion in class on oxytocin. That in several occasions oxytocin is released from a woman, occasions such as when breast-feeding and when the women engages in sex. The drug allows the women to become close to the person that releases the hormone. Meaning that having sex or any type of sexual encounter; handholding, sex etc. with one men releases oxytocin in the women that produces a bond the woman feels between the man and herself. For this reason it is said that having sex with too many man where there is no emotional