Soccer was not just a game to me, it was my first addiction. From the moment a ball was put in front of me I fell in love with the beautiful game but over time it slowly started to kill me. January 20, 2016 is the day my life ended, my sick twisted excuse of a life. I wasn’t really living, I was trapped in this numb fog for over three years and I didn’t realize how much it was destroying me. I couldn’t even recognize myself in the mirror. I was fighting so hard to hold on to this game that it almost killed me. On that day in January was the last soccer game I have ever played. I got my 8th concussion and was rushed to the hospital. I have no recollection of the following month. I woke up one day and all I knew is I needed to get my next fix.
My body is weak. Something is always breaking or tearing so if I wanted to play, I kept having to find ways to glue myself together. The day I found Oxycodone is the day I thought I found the solution to life. Not only did it take
…show more content…
I don’t have to be angry that I woke up and wasn’t dead. I am in no way “fixed” but at least I have tools to help me face life on life’s terms. It took almost dying from brain damage to get me clean but now I see that it was all worth it. There’s life without soccer. I am an artist and a very good student, I have realized that I can do anything I want to as long as I continue to stay clean. Life is still rough, I still think about using again but I know how quickly I can destroy my life. I want to make something of myself so I have to work extra hard because I am an addict. I have goals of going college, exploring art, and maybe even having my own family. I am able to be in my own head now and not be terrified of all the never ending noise. The drugs were just another way my addiction manifested. I got high as soon as I woke up, when I was in pain, when i was bored, it didn’t matter when it was, there was never a wrong time when it came to getting