I have always had a hard time expressing my emotions. I never want anyone to see what is really going on inside. I always have just gotten over what I am feeling and moved on. As my problems became more and more complicated I began to always feel anxious and sad. At this point in time my mother and I weren 't as close as we are now. When I thought I had hit my lowest point, I kept it to myself. I knew my mother already had her own issues and I didn 't believe what I was feeling was a big deal.
I don 't remember exactly everything that happened, but I do remember the constant fighting and crying. My stepdad, we call him Johnson, had been lying to my mom about a handful of things and it was causing them to argue. I remember always asking my
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Thursday night I went to my dad 's and I didn 't hear from my mom. Friday night I went to a school dance then spent the night at a friend’s house. That night I was anxious about how my mom was doing. I hadn’t heard from her since Wednesday night. Saturday morning my dad came to pick me up and he told me that my mom was in the hospital. He wouldn 't tell me why and kept dodging my questions. I went back to my dad 's house and took a shower. As I was almost finished getting ready I got a call from a random number. I had a feeling that it was my mom, so I answered. I immediately started crying because she told me that she just did something stupid, I knew what that meant. When we went to see her I was so upset that she was hurt. I hated Johnson for what he had put her through. My mom got out of the hospital and came home. I thought everything was a lot better and we could finally move on. Soon after she took him back. She knew that my brother and I wanted nothing to do with him. That didn 't affect her decision, though. I have matured so much in the past four years. The whole situation made me realize that trust must be earned. Breaking someone’s trust can change a lot of things. I didn 't notice this right away, but it is a lot harder for me to open up to people. I always question what people 's intentions are because I don 't want to hurt the way I saw my