Yes, I am.
I have a hard time accepting it but each of us is a sexual being. For me, I tried to never to act on it, it was trying to act like a good boy, and not doing what all the other guys were doing, fairly simple. Considering my true identity.
I tried to date, I was horrible at it. I couldn’t sustain the interest level other guys had in girls. It left me thinking something is wrong here, but what?
It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure my issues with secretly dressing up as a girl/woman and my secret fantasies weren’t just a phase or little fetish. I felt ashamed and fearful, it was all wrong, I was wrong to think it. I was a freak.
In time the pull was too great, the lure too strong.
I came to grips with it all when I tried online dating, as a female. I expected to receive hate and rage but it never came arrived. My photos were sleazy and to male-oriented focused. I knew what guys wanted, the angles the looks the clothes. I didn’t mind being sexualized.
Fortunately, I date on rare occasion, however, I harden to the sexual messages that I received. The lust some guys had for a nonexistent woman(I only cross-dressed in private to myself) was kind of sad and funny. It did some mind twisting in my head.
As time passed and I began to get jaded to guys sexual wants and lured minds I won’t lie, I twisted a few guys minds for revenge, in
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Men consist 50% of most markets and using all of one’s assets to garner attention isn’t wrong I believe. Selling actual sex maybe a line I won’t cross but through a third-dimensional entity like print and electronically doesn’t count as wrong. It means I will likely endure creepy weirdoes, stalkers, and taunts by misunderstanding men who can’t separate between illusion and reality. Not one of us, male or female, is the way we are, in public, or even private, just a shadowy figment of our