READINESS STATEMENT - RDAP PROGRAM:
I have not been a good father, son, husband, uncle or friend. But I have been a good alcoholic, a bon vivant. I have an addiction that has adversely affected the world I inhabited and everything that I held dear. Whatever vanity of expectation that has caused a lack of discernment resulting in the present - here and now, my contemplation stage has come to an end as I am fully prepared to engage in this program.
My life of addiction has been an absurd disgrace to be exceeded in disgracefulness only by death. After many years of drinking resulting in the diagnosis of cirrhosis of the liver in 2014, I had not fully comprehended or appreciated the seriousness of the damage I let alcohol cause. My addiction
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Lack of humility prevented self-analysis and self-castigation. Lack of responsibility and caring allowed my addiction to consume all my attention at the expense of my loved ones, my children, my duty as a professional, as a lawyer, and to those who entrusted me with their business affairs.
Drinking was an attractive mistress. It was a love affair that allowed temporary reprieve of emotional issues - allowing my mind to ululated with jubilation while multiplying the long term problems with innumerable negative lifetime consequences. My father's death while not an excuse provided the impetus that exacerbate to considerable exaggeration my love affair with drinking.
It saddens me deeply to be away from my children and love ones, but more so to acknowledge that I am the agency of if all. Nevertheless, I seek not to assuage my guilt through Machiavellian tactics, or excuses, but to self-accountability responsibility, with humility through caring.
I grew up with in a loving family with a zest for education, and respect