Both of these personal statements are great for very different reasons. I really enjoyed the first one for how personal and telling it was. Midway in the second paragraph, you create this connection that draws the reader and makes him want to know more of your life story. When you say “English continues to help me grow, not only as a student, but as an individual,” I wanted to know more! In addition, I really liked how you tied with the idea of being an outsider in academia when you say, “one would imagine that only the students who are “outsiders” are granted acceptance.” This was elegantly and artistically stated. Moreover, I also really like how the second one cuts to the chase: you state who you are, what you want to do, and how you’re