I am naturally, unknowingly, irrevocably attracted to violence; although I deny it. I may have lost my innocence, but my sense of self remains. Somewhere in there, is a young girl detached from reality trying to wake up from a non-existent dream. Engulfed by my own thoughts and not knowing what to expect, I hesitantly entered the large sliding glass doors of the psychiatric hospital. A huge gust of cold air masked by the typical antiseptic smell hit me in the face like a tonne of bricks. As I walk down the eerie corridors consumed by the stark white walls, I am bombarded by rather unfriendly and judgemental looks. The stone cold air, flickering fluorescent lights and squeaky floorboards was not exactly the welcoming committee I had anticipated. “Please don’t leave me here mum, don’t leave me with these crazy people. They’re insane!” I cried. My eyes drowned out by the tears that ran down my soft face like an over flowing river; the salty taste that entered my mouth as I stood there, helpless, I felt trapped. ‘I’m not insane. I know that, but they don’t…I don’t belong here!’ I thought to myself. Now I was in a place that redefined me. Now I was a ‘psycho’, a ‘loony’, one of those pitiful beings who lurk in the shadows of our society. …show more content…
Reflecting on the difference between the mind and the brain, it was now impossible to block out the persistent blare penetrating through the thick wall of my skull, I lay in darkness and allow my thoughts to consume me. I wish that the constant buzz of unfamiliar voices would eventually slip into a dull hum in the back of my mind. My brain is an extinguished fire. Once it burnt bright and I knew of happiness and contentment; I could see a future for myself... Now my mind is dark, living on the burnt memories of who I was. My body is here but my mind is in a very different