Sex Lies And Conversation Deborah Tannen Summary

Men and women are, undoubtedly, different in various ways. In the literal sense, the difference between men and women lies in their varying physiological features. It is fundamentally based on the fact that they view the world through different perspectives. These differing perspectives range from how they listen to how they are raised. Hence, one primary approach to understanding the difference between men and women involves evaluating how they carry out their conversation. A compare-and-contrast essay called "Sex, Lies, and conversations" was created by Deborah Tannen. That essay intended to highlight many communication problems between men and women due to differing expectations and habits. Tannen asserts that studies on the factors contributing

Tannen explains, "boys and girls tend to play with children of their own gender, and their sex-separate groups have different organizational structures and interactive norms" (409). Although this line illustrates the difference between men's and women's social structures in childhood, similarities between the two genders are apparent. For one, child friend groups of only one gender are not exclusive to either boys or girls. Additionally, these child friend groups have specific structures exclusive to the group's characteristics, gender, and communication rather than copying parts of the opposite sex's child friend group. However, the characteristics of these groups traditionally contradict each other. Friend groups exclusive to boys usually are more inclusive and act more like a hierarchy. In contrast, friend groups exclusive to girls are usually more exclusive and act more like a

Tannen notes, "These differences clarify why women and men have such different expectations of communication in marriage" (411). From the wife's perspective, talking is a sign of intimacy required to maintain the marriage. Through this perspective, she sees marriage as being able to open up to someone while still being loved. On the contrary, most men view communication in marriage dissimilarly from their wives. From the husband's perspective, talking represents one's social status and independence. Through this perspective, he sees marriage as being able to be silent without having to prove himself and without needing to defend himself against