In today's society, certain genders are given different roles to play from day to day. Unfortunately, the traits associated with both males and females are a distortion of reality in which we are told to conform to either unrealistic or rigid expectations. For example, as we saw the documentary The Mask I Live In, in which, social standards for my gender (male) were revealed to me, I underwent a realization of the unrealistic standards and rigid roles we are set to play. In more specific detail, alike to excerpt, we read from Guyland by Michael Kimmel we learn that starting at a young age, during our formative years we are taught how to “Be a Man” and what society expects from us, which conceal our true masculinity; examples include: “Boys Don’t Cry, It’s Better to Be Mad than Sad, and I Don’t Stop to Ask for Directions.”
Due to the current distortion in our society, boys are brought up to hide their
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Thus Tony proposes his idea of a “man box” which shows how men believe they should act, examples include: “Do not be ‘like a woman’, View women as Property/Objects, Demonstrate power-control, and aggression/Dominance.” In addition, Tony provides his own experience as a father and his enlightenment of where men obtain these rash qualities — from our fathers. Thus starting at a young age we are taught how to “be a man” however, this root of manhood is exaggerated and society is to blame. Tony Porter also gives his testimony about when he was twelve years old and how he was pressured into “being a man” by having sex with a woman who was incapable of understanding that she was being raped, fortunately, Tony did not copulate with her but acted as if he did so. In the end, our society must change to fit everyone's needs without forcing others to abide by the distorted expectations that damage our self-being and others around