Abuse In It Ends With Us By Colleen Hoover

The Abused & The Abuser

Abuse is a pervasive problem that affects millions of individuals worldwide, regardless of age, gender, or race. Through Colleen Hoover's portrayal of abuse in the book It Ends with Us, readers gain a deeper understanding of the devastating impact that abuse can have on individuals and communities. It Ends with Us, by Colleen Hoover realistically depicts the normalization of abuse, various forms of abuse such as psychological manipulation, and the prevalence of rape and abuse in society through the struggles of her main character.

One problem highlighted in the book It Ends with Us is the prevalence of the standardization of abuse. An example written in the book is, “He’s not like my father. He can't be. He’s nothing

This example illustrates how the normalization of abusive behavior can perpetuate and enable its prevalence in society, as seen in Hoover's poignant writing. A researcher writes, “The United States is, by some measures, an extraordinarily violent society. Many of the most popular films and television programs have featured idealized men who act with violence, which is seen as a legitimate, even the best, solution to problems. Sociologists and others argue that people can become desensitized and come to believe violence to be acceptable behavior in the world outside entertainment” (Kramer). According to the article, the widespread of idealized male characters who use violence to solve problems in popular films and television programs has desensitized people and led to a belief that violence is an acceptable solution to real-life issues, contributing to the United States' reputation as an extremely violent society. These promote abuse or violence as a positive behavior and can influence the audience to view various forms of violence as acceptable, standardizing violent behavior and contributing to the normalization of abuse. According to

Hoover writes, “I’m so sorry, it all happened so fast. I didn’t mean to push you, Lily, I'm sorry,” I do not hear Ryles’ voice this time. All I hear is my father's voice. “I'm sorry, Jenny. It was an accident. I am so sorry.” “I'm sorry. Lily. It was an accident I’m so sorry” (Hoover 186). The passage shows that abusers may utilize apologies and false displays of remorse to manipulate and exert power over their victims, a tactic that is all too familiar in cases of sexual harassment and rape. This illustrates the significant occurrence of abuse and violence in people's lives, as evidenced by Lily's struggles with her late father and fiancé in the book. Liz Kramer writes, “Through the National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey (based on data from 2016 and 2017, the latest available), the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) reported in 2022 that over half of both female and male victims living in the US had experienced rape by an acquaintance while 39.3 percent and 12.5 percent had experienced rape by an intimate partner in their lifetime, respectively” (Kramer). This data highlights the urgent need for comprehensive prevention strategies and increased support for survivors of sexual violence in the US. The staggering statistics from the CDC's National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey underscore the disturbing amount of rape and sexual assault in