Bonnie Mann's Two Harms Of Creepliness

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Bonnie Mann examines four possible roles men play regarding sexual harassment: creepers, flirts, heroes, and allies. Mann describes two harms of creepiness, the first one is time theft. Human relation requires time and patience, which is something the creeper is not interested in. Once he sexualizes the encounter, he steals time by already having decided what the encounter is before the woman has even said a word. By doing this, he has reduced the complexity of the encounter and it no longer matters what the woman wants, the creeper has already decided based on his own desires and his sense of sexual entitlement. The creeper feels entitled to women’s attention and he expects her to accept or refuse sexual advances as a way to prove his power. The second harm of creepiness is the pre-emption of her very way-of-having-a-world. Essentially this means that creepers prevent a woman from going about her business by challenging her self-worth, this is especially true if the creeper is in a position of power. …show more content…

Mann points out that there are situations in which flirting is inappropriate, for example, in hierarchical relationships, however, in the right environment flirtation can be exciting and erotic. Flirts, in contrast with creepers, give back time. This means that flirting is a process, a playful exchange between two people, which takes time. Flirtation is full of open ended possibilities and intense, erotically charged curiosities. Such an occurrence is possible because flirtation is an invitation rather than a demand. The flirt is respectful, he waits, listens, and responds, he understands that, “no means