Conformity In The Lovely Bones

Men and women tend to behave in a way that will allow them to fit in, as opposed to doing what will make them the happiest. The characters in "The Lovely Bones" by Alice Sebold experience this push toward conformity while coping with a terrible loss. Abigail, after the social norms of her generation forces her towards motherhood, must come to terms with her shortcomings. This absence of a proper mother figure affects Abigail's son, Buckley, by depriving him of the ability to freely show his pain. Ruth, however, is able to defy social norms surrounding sexuality, but faces the consequences of being different in a world filled with similarity. Much of the harm caused in this book is the result of the characters attempting to act in a way society

He grows and evolves throughout the novel into “something stronger than a little boy,” because he has grown up too fast due to years of acting older than his age (217). Buckley bottles his thoughts in order to protect not only himself from judgement and ridicule, but also his family because he has seen how much the, in turn, have tried to shield him from harsh reality. However, this strategy of dealing with one's grief has had the opposite effect as Buckley becomes prone to outbursts of anger when faced with a problem he has avoided dealing with. He see this when Abigail returns after abandoning his family for so long and he releases his “underground storage room of hate,” (269). In reality, Buckley's feelings err closer to sadness and confusion about the pain his mother causes him, but because of society discouraging young men from actions such as crying or discussing, but rather presses them towards acting out rashly, he knows no other way of dealing with these emotions. Buckley’s distress could have been avoided if he had been taught to openly express himself rather preventing something that happens so