Terrible Creatures, Terrible Ideas Fact: Yellow jackets are evil. Scientists don’t like to anthropomorphize animals because it’s improper, but it is true. Yellow jackets are made out of pure, unadulterated, concentrated evil. They swarm around my cookouts and try to land in open soda can (eventually resulting in). At the same time, I probably deserve about 90% of the stings I’ve received considering my history of deliberately messing with active nests. If I had a wasp suit, I’d still somehow manage to get stung while exterminating a colony. The earliest interaction I remember with these yellow and black striped stinging demons was when I was around seven years old, just as I was entering the second grade. The nest was in the base of a lamppost, one of those tall squarish ones that have extremely bright LEDs at the top. This base was just …show more content…
Namely, a rock that one of us would chuck. Presumably, we would hit the square base and something amazing would happen. I didn’t know what, but we assumed it would be amazing nonetheless. The shortest kid of the three handed me a grey rock. Smooth, perfect for angering stinging insects. I stepped back, readying my throw, and launched the rock directly at the base. The rock, amazingly, missed! I managed to throw just too far to the left. Saved by what could only be described by a message from God telling me to stop doing that you absolute idiot! If I had paid any attention, I would have heard the angels singing as they deflected the rock off it’s path. In the face of this absolute miracle, I did the only logical thing a child could do in this situation. Run up towards the plastic box and kick it of course! It made a sharp thwack sound, and soon about a dozen yellow creatures came pouring out of the small opening. I thought I had unleashed a plague of wasps onto the