Duality Research Paper

In my somewhat short time on Earth, I have come across many problems. Negativity has been a constant factor in my life. At times negativity consumes my thinking and clouds my brain. I have a bad habit of comparing myself to everyone I see, and looking at a picture of myself long enough until I see every small flaw and begin to wish I was someone else. While I have this negative side, darkness is balanced by light. My light is the people I surround myself with, my family, my favorite bands and my favorite sports. When the negativity starts to pull me under, I am pulled back by the people who care about me. Light cannot exist without darkness. No one can always be happy and no one should always be sad. Balancing the duality is key. When I was

As I started growing up and moving into the older grades I started to think that being different was bad. I remember being as young as ten and comparing myself to all the other girls. I had chubby cheeks, and plain brown eyes, and I never really dressed like any of the other girls either. A friend and I completely stopped talking in the beginning of fifth grade. When I asked her why a few months later, she told me I was “annoying and immature”. That really stuck with me. In sixth grade I was invited to a party. I was excited to go and I thought these girls were my friends. It wasn't until the next year they told me that they only invited me because they felt sorry for me, and that they did not like me at the time. After I was told this, I often asked myself “What if they still don't like me? What if they just feel bad for me?” The whole seventh grade my “friends” would pick out little things about my outfits

After dealing with so much self loathing and sadness, positivity is vital to me. During my roughest days, my friends have been there to make me laugh even when I’m a crying wreck. My friends have shaped me into the person I have become. From venting sessions, to trips to water parks, vacations, all nighters with watching the sunrise, or just making faces at each other during class, my friends manage to shed such light into my life. Music is a huge source of positivity in my life. Sometimes there is song where you connect so deeply with it that the lyrics run in your veins and your heart beat is the beat of the song. The singer’s voice resounds in your head, and the harmonies match perfectly. The song replays in your head filling you with strong emotions with dizzying intensity. Music is an outlet for me. If I feel hopeless, I listen to those types of songs until I feel complete again. Acting takes me out of my own head and into someone else life. I can forget about my own problems and become engulfed in my character’s story. I am no longer a girl in the small town of Carmel, New York, I am someone with a different name, and a different story, and there is something strangely comforting in that to me, that fills me with a type of joy that cannot be described. There is something about cheer that fills my life with more positivity. When I step on the mat, in front of crowds