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Guilt And Shame In On The Rainy River By Tim O Brien

830 Words4 Pages

Guilt and shame are invisible forces that bind us to what if’s, and keeps us from pursuing life in a carefree manner. If we so feel that we are choosing the path that’s wrong for us even if it is what we believe is best, guilt will be there to pull us back into our place and shame will follow to remind us of our mistakes. Tim O’Brien, from the short story “On the Rainy River” by Tim O’Brien, essentially succumbs to the guilt he feels from attempting a flee to Canada in order to avoid the Vietnam War, and the consequence of feeling shame that arises from that.

Family often plays a significant role in the way we live our lives. It is not uncommon that even as grown adults we will revolve our own decisions based on the ones around us and how they would feel about our actions. Tim O’Brien envisions his father when he thinks about leaving and how disappointed he would be as he confesses what he chose to do. Although he almost crosses into Canada, it is evident that the ties to his father and how he would react influence his decision. O’Brien mentions losing …show more content…

Often if we give up, or fail to reach them we feel ashamed that we are not strong enough to overcome obstacles and we place blame on other aspects of our life to try and re-direct our own personal guilt. O’Brien was held back from leaving to Canada because of “all [the] eyes on [him], the town, the whole universe- and [he] couldn’t risk embarrassment.” He blames himself even many years later because he “was a coward” who “went to the war.” This demonstrates the guilt he places on himself because he gave in to his surroundings and the shame he feels that he couldn’t stand up for what he didn’t agree with, which was the war itself. Although he went to war because he of what the people in his town would think of him, he also didn’t want to live with himself knowing that the shadow of the war would follow him wherever he

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Before the war O’Brien worked hard on his studies and didn’t believe in the war. Once he got drafted into the war he had a moral split. He seriously contemplated running away from his problems and fleeing to Canada. Minnesota and Canada separated one life from another. He drove up to a lodge where he met an older man who changed his life forever.

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Like O’Brian himself, the men did not try to escape the war because they would have the nation, especially their loved ones, looking down upon them. They were trained to be strong and to set an example of what it means to be “strong”. All men had a fear of dying, but had a greater fear of dying as a coward than as a

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This quote is from O’Brien the author himself admitting that he couldn’t be brave enough to leave his country and that he was embarrassed of what he was trying to do. So, he told himself that he would go to war, kill and maybe die because of the embarrassment idea he made. The idea of this quote is to explain what he feeling/confusion between what he’d do. Should he go to war? Or should he leave his loved ones and country behind.?

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O'Brien emphasizes the difference between the troops' actual experiences and how those experiences are portrayed in the society and by the government throughout the entire story. He discusses how soldiers are taught to "spin" their perspectives in order to make them more appealing to the American public, frequently by praising their own bravery and understating the atrocities of war. He explains how soldiers can eventually have feelings of remorse and shame due to their sensitivity to violence and

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“The emotions went from outrage to terror to bewilderment to guilt to sorrow… I felt a sickness inside of me. Real disease” (O’Brien 43). The idea of going to war brought up so many different feelings for Tim O’Brien including guilt. Tim O’Brien felt that if he didn’t go to war, then people would practically bully him and think that he was a coward for not going to the war. Tim experienced something that many people call an apparition, and his version of one was when many people he knew from the past were shaming him for not going to the war, and for running from it.

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At this moment, O’Brien is going through remorse for himself. He does not think that he should be forced to fight in this war when he does not believe in what they are fighting for. O’Brien believes that the war was unjust because “certain blood was being shed for uncertain reasons” (1002).O’Brien

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In the short story, “The Man I Killed,” O’Brien focuses on this to show that everyone fighting in a war has a story. He spends the story describing the man he killed and searching for justification of his actions. He carries around guilt with him because of it, and his fellow soldiers try to help him justify and come to terms with his action by saying things like, “You want to trade places with him? Turn it all upside down= you want that? I mean, be honest,” (126) and “Tim, it’s a war.

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Individuals often compromise their happiness to conform better within society by meeting their expectations. The main character, O’Brien, showed hesitance about experiencing societal pressure as a result of his fearful behavior about joining the army to fight in the war. This was demonstrated when O'Brien stated, "I couldn't tolerate it. I couldn't endure the mockery, or the disgrace, or the patriotic ridicule". This quote supports my argument as it illustrates the societal pressure O'Brien faces because he ran away from his "duty" of fighting alongside his nation since a man is not supposed to show cowardice and only present bravery, according to society.

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In “Ambush”, where O’Brien killed a lone Vietnamese soldier, we get a glimpse of how O’Brien reacts to the experiences he undergoes during the war. O’Brien gives a grisly description of the dead man’s corpse, showing just how deeply the memory is etched into his brain. O’Brien also speaks of how, years later, he “hasn’t finished sorting it out” (O’Brien 128). Despite so much time passing, he is still incapable of forgiving himself for the things he did during the war. Further, this isn’t the only experience that O’Brien isn’t able to get past.

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The chapter is talking about moments in life where you are in a position where it can be life changing. Tim had the opportunity to leave the war and start a new life, but he was afraid of leaving. At the same time he was nervous about how it would be in Canada. “ I felt paralyzed. All around me the options seemed to be narrowing, as if I were hurtling down a huge black funnel, the whole world squeezing in tight” (O’Brien 41).

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Survivor's guilt took play in Tim O'Brien and also many of his buddies. They had especially felt guilt for the men that they had killed. In the chapter “The Man I Killed”, Tim expresses his feelings of guilt for the man he had thrown a grenade at while he had exposed himself on the open trail. Tim O'Brien expressed how much the man that he had killed had to live for. In his head, he created a future for a man he did not even known.

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O’Brien tells the readers about him reflecting back twenty years ago, he wonders if running away from the war were just events that happened in another dimension, he pictures himself writing a letter to his parents: “I’m finishing up a letter to my Parents that tells what I'm about to do and why I'm doing it and how sorry I am that I’d never found the courage to talk to them about it”(O’Brien 80). Even twenty years after his running from the war, O’Brien still feels sorry for not finding the courage to tell his parents about his decision of escaping to Canada to start a new life. O’Brien presented his outlook that even if someone was not directly involved in the war, this event had impacted them indirectly, for instance, how a person’s reaction to the war can create regret for important friends and

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This quote epitomizes the trauma caused by war. O’Brien is trying to cope, mostly through writing these war stories but has yet to put it behind him. He feels guilt, grief, and responsibility, even making up possible scenarios about the life of the man he killed and the type of person he was. This

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Those who cannot escape their past will be forever haunted by the decisions they have made. “The man i killed” This is one of o 'brien 's many stories that would unfold throughout the book however, this is the first real sign of guilt we see from the author’s perspective. When describing the guilt of others and the things they had to carry, he has a different approach to his own guilt. Rather than succumbing to his guilt he instead begins to write war stories to divert the thoughts of the terrible things that have transpired during the war. He uses these stories in his head to try and imagine what it would be like if those who were killed, would have survived and how their lives would have panned out.

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This is evident when Mr. O’Brien says, “I would go to the war – I would kill and maybe die – because I was embarrassed not to,” (pg. 57.) In the end the author realized what he must do and went back home, so he could fight in the Vietnam

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