Nonperfectionism In Intimate Relationships

Intimate relationships has been highly affected by perfectionism (Flett et al., 2002). Ashby, Rice and Kutchins (2008) conducted a study which demonstrated that there has been five different groups in intimate: both adaptive, both maladaptive, one adaptive and one maladaptive, one adaptive and nonperfectionistic and lastly one maladaptive and nonperfectionistic (as cited in Improving Lives counseling, 2013, p.3). The findings demonstrated that when couples were both maladaptive, the possibility of the relationship to be functioning is highly decreasing (Ashby et al., 2008 as cited in Improving Lives counseling, 2013, p.5). Moreover, when both spouses are adaptive, their intimate relationship was more functional. Furthermore, comparing with

Ashby et al. (2008) added to these statement that having a poor quality relationship was obvious in maladaptive perfectionists (as cited in Improving Lives counseling, 2013, p.5). However, in a relationship if both spouses are maladaptive, their relationship has seem only negative outcomes. Having a partner who is maladaptive perfectionist is seen as a problem because when maladaptive perfectionists are criticized, they answer excessively sensitive (Ashby et al., 2008 as cited in Improving Lives counseling, 2013, p.6). Also, when they are hurt emotionally, they respond aggressively in their intimate relationships. Besides, they have tendencies to fear the intimacy, commitment etc. and they expect their partner to be

It was also found if adaptive perfectionists have a spouse who is adaptive perfectionist or nonperfectionist, they would have had a more satisfying relationship. Adaptive perfectionists have more self-esteem, self-efficacy, positive effect, internal control, secure internalized working model and also lose inferiority feelings in regards to adult attachment (Ashby & Kattman, 1996; LoCicero & Ashby, 2000; Periasmy & Ashby, 2000; Rice of Slaney, 2002 as cited in Improving Lives counseling, 2013, p.8). Because of those positive characteristics, they have healthier relationships (Ashby et al., 2008 as cited in Improving Lives counseling, 2013,