Graduation Speech: Mr. Peat The Frog

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen I would like to thank you all for coming to represent Mr. Peat the frog today. For today, we mourn a misunderstood friend. Just a few days ago, Peat the Frog shimmied off this mortal coil and hopped up to the big lily pad in the sky. Unfortunately, there’re currently chanting and carrying disgusting images outside this very funeral parlor, but let us try to drown out their hatred with our love. Though Mr. Peat fought bravely and happily, he lost his years, but take heart, for he passed while smoking an epic spliff, surrounded by his friends Andy, Aden, and Lundon, all of whom were kind enough to join us

He was 12 years old, but in frog years, he in his early 20s. We weep for him, and at this point in the service, I invite you all to fulfill Pepe’s wishes by sparking up the joints we have provided for all of you. For those of you who didn’t know Peat as well as some of us did, I’ll provide a bit of biography for you. Peat was born in 2005 of November on the MySpace page of his father, the cartoonist Matt Furie, who also joins us today and asked me to tell you, “It’s just a comic.” Matt had high hopes for his boy, placing him alongside his other offspring — the aforementioned Andy, Aden, and Lundon in a web comic called Boy’s Club. The home that Matt built for his children was a loving one, in which the four lads lived together and did, not much of anything. They ate; they gamed; they modeled; they shat; they baked; they vegged out. But perhaps most important,