"My first raid was on December thirty-first, over Ludwigshaven. Naturally, not knowing what it was going to be like, I didn 't feel scared. A little sick, maybe, but not scared. That comes later, when you begin to understand what your chances of survival are. Once we 'd crossed into Germany, we spotted some flak, but it was a good long distance below us and looked pretty and not dangerous: different-colored puffs making a soft, cushiony-looking pattern under our plane. A bombardier sits right in the plexiglas nose of a Fort, so he sees everything neatly laid out in front of him, like a living-room rug. It seemed to me at first that I 'd simply moved in on a wonderful show. ' I got over feeling sick, there was so much to