At the age of twelve I had had been invited to go on a week long missions trip to Hamilton Ohio. For several days we had ran a VBS program. Despite being an agnostic, I had been in charge of my own small group of kindergarteners. I had helped lead the bible stories, sang with them and danced to the corny sign filled dances. However, I my heart wasn’t in it. I had separated myself from with a temple veil of a hood. Several children sat in front of the projector screen on the carpeted floor. Each with faces of green stone, nearly unreactive or disgusted by the graphic nature of the film. I laid curled up with my eyes closed and my ears open to the painful cries of a man I barely knew. My body shook as I heard every heavy blow. I imaged them on my …show more content…
I picked my body up and ran towards the restroom in fear of vomiting on myself. I was frantic to get there. I continued to weep. I laid myself beside the porcelain on the cold, hard floor. It contrasted my hot wet face. I could smell the toilet bowl cleaner. I heard the door open and . I was asked if I was okay. I replied I was, despite the quiver in my voice. felt a hard dense ball like a jawbreaker in my throat. She helped me up and leaned me against the . I started to vomit violently. I felt her hands pull my hair back. Battery acid came out of my nose and esophagus. When I was done I rinsed out my mouth and returned to the room. The room was now full of light. I couldn’t meet anyone 's gaze so I focused on the man in the front. He spoke of love and sacrifice, not for just anyone, but for me. I was offered the opportunity to be forgiven for the first time. I had came on this retreat to help others but he had helped me. The same blood that raised thoughts of disgust in some eyes were beautiful in mine. I had been baptised in tears. The evil of my inner, my being was literally projected out from me. I made an unshakeable commitment, despite my trembling. That day I had accepted Christ into my heart