Thomas broke up with me once he was accepted into college at the University of California Santa Barbara. He was going to be moving across the country, and I was going to be a senior in high school trying to figure out where I wanted to go to college. At the time he got accepted, I was falling in love with Thomas, but never told him. I was way too young and naive to tell him I loved him, and he knew this. On New Year’s Eve, Thomas told me there’s a pursuer and a settler in every relationship. He went on to say that I was settling for him and he was always the one pursuing me, but Thomas ended up breaking it off me with. In lecture when we discussed dances of intimacy, and one dance made me think of Thomas instantly. The pursuer-distancer dance