“You're Just Looking for Attention”
Everybody has that one word that triggers them. A word that brings up so many emotions at once, it's like a kick to the gut. For me, that word is “attention”. I loathe that word.
Merriam-Webster defines attention as:
: the act or power of carefully thinking about, listening to, or watching someone or something
: notice, interest, or awareness
: special care or treatment
From these definitions, it may not make sense that such a positive word could be so enraging. However, despite its friendly meaning, has been used as a weapon against me. It was also used as an excuse to dismiss me as a human being, and a way for others to absolve themselves of any responsibility regarding my need for special care.
See, I was born sick.
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I'm stable now. I have my good days and my bad days. I'm grateful for every peaceful moment. I've also come to understand something very important. There's nothing wrong with needing or wanting attention. It's a human survival mechanism.
Unfortunately, back in a little exam room in the 1980s, a doctor ignored my symptoms and changed the entire course of my life by telling my family I was just “looking for attention” and advising them to ignore me.
Well, I'm not ignored anymore. I won't allow others to be, either. My story may be unique, but it is in no way uncommon. Far too many women have had their medical conditions dismissed because a man in a white lab coat said she was “fine” or “just depressed”.
No one person should EVER have that kind of sway over the way others perceive an individual. Doctors are not gods. They are human and make mistakes, too. Therefore, their words should not be taken as gospel.
I created I Told You I Was Sick back in 2010 to support and validate those living with chronic illness and help them find the real reasons behind their mystery