In The Giver, by Lois Lowry, the protagonist Jonas, and the readers, realize what a true family is: one that respects boundaries, demonstrates true feelings, and includes anyone they truly love.
To start, Jonas’s family lacks privacy. In the Community, every family has a lack of frontier. In Jonas’s family, his mother, father, and sister don’t respect each other's privacy. In his civilization, it is vital not to lie and share everything. Jonas realizes how abnormal his society's expectations for families are after receiving the memories of an actual family. When Jonas walks downstairs in the morning, Mother interrogates, “You slept soundly, Jonas? His mother asked at the morning meal. “No dreams?” Jonas simply smiled and nodded, not ready to
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Jonas knew what love was, but he didn’t know the feeling of warmth and adoration. His family never felt compassion towards Jonas either. This was the same with the whole Community, no one felt love. When people do feel a sense of intimacy, they have to take a pill to get rid of their feelings. Mother explained, “...You’re ready for the pills, that’s all. That’s the treatment for Stirrings.” (Lowry 48) This demonstrates that whenever someone feels “Stirrings' ' which is a feeling of love towards another person that you’re not related to, they’re asked to take a pill to forget those feelings. You could also tell that Jonas’s family is uncomfortable with the thought of affection, Jonas questions his father, “Do you love me?” (Lowry 159). In response, his father exclaims, “Jonas. You, of all people. Precision of language, please!” (Lowry 159). This shows that Jonas’s father felt awkward and didn’t know what to say or do. Furthermore, the Committee of Elders makes people forget negative feelings. One example is when you lose a loved one, that person’s existence is completely forgotten. Not only is love forgotten, but all negative emotions were forgotten. Therefore, Jonas realizes that real families have feelings towards each other whether it’s love or negative