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Augusten Burroughs 'How To Identify Love Knowing What It's Not'

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Know What Relationship Your In In “How to identify Love Knowing What it’s Not” Augusten Burroughs provides a definition of abuse that is more nuanced than physical harm. The formal definition of abuse is the improper usage or treatment of an entity, often to unfairly or improperly gain benefit. There are many different types of abuse and the essay touches base on four different types. Abuse is a spectrum that ranges from controlling, to emotional abuse, to physical abuse. For instance, controlling abuse is the way that an abusive person gains and maintains power and control over the person. In the essay it states “An abusive partner is controlling. They are manipulative. They might make a special point of coyly sharing information that they actually know will upset you”. In other words the person wants to get under your skin about anything. There is no support within the relationship that you have with that person. As in the essay of the married couple Burroughs knew of and how the wife left the husband. She also moved out the house but left her dog with him. Months went by without any type of communication on her dog but an email she received saying that the dog had a health problem and he …show more content…

Abusers always want things to get better but for some it never will. Some people don’t even recognize that they are in a abuse relationship, and if they do recognize they are still dealing with it because most likely their is a kid involved. If you think your in a domestic violence relationship contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline or you can think about the things I mention earlier and see is anything relates to you and your relationship. “Don’t let your loyalty become slavery. If they don’t appreciate what you bring to the table… then let them eat alone” - Anonymous. This is a quote that I personally remember because you can’t disrespect yourself. THEY ARE ALWAYS SORRY REMEMBER

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- When abuse has been ongoing for a length of time , the victim can feel like she/he deserves the abuse, is in denial over the extent of the abuse, embarrassed about others finding out, fear being killed if they left and fear the impact on the children or losing the children. Many victims of domestic and family violence, believe nothing can be done for them- they see on the news how little action is done such as in the case of Benjamin Ard and the assault of two women. In this case Ard charged with domestic violence, but was released from jail on $1,000 cash bail. He went on to breach his bail and was then charged with domestic violence assault and violating the conditions of release from a prior charge; he was sentenced to only thirteen months

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The power and control wheel, a tool used when trying to educate victims of IPV, is symbolically represented throughout the book by demonstrating how these abusers keep control of their partners. This wheel details eight forms of violence that abusers commonly use to keep control over their partner, that include, using male privilege and coercion and threats to maintain dominance (Burgess et al., 2012, p. 300). Victimology also studies, the effects such patterns of abuse have on an individual, such as learned helplessness and PTSD (Burgess et al., 2012, p. 300). Furthermore, it is grounded in the approaches and steps of action to take in order to help victims of trauma and

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Most abuse are related with misuse or mistreatment. Abuse is a threat or any single abusive act, psychological or physical. Any pattern of physical, sexual, or emotional assaults can be abuse. The failure to attend to the basic human needs of a person can be neglect. Physical abuse explained a physical assault or pattern of behavior that attacks the victim’s physical integrity.

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(Hook) Abuse is a overly toxic action that causes many pushbacks in ones life. (Bridge) In Laurie Halse Andersons’s novel Speak, Melinda, the protagonist, experiences abuse and readers see just how much it is displayed in her everyday life. (FS) From as early as the beginning of the novel, readers see Melinda is an outcast.

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There are many types of abuse he uses like Economic Abuse in the form of: taking her money/ valuables; not letting him/ her know about the family income; Mr. Snopes used Intimidation Abuse and he used it in these ways: making him / her afraid by using looks, actions, gestures; destroying her property; abusing pets. Mr. Snopes uses isolation by; limiting his/her outside involvement; controlling what he she does, who he/she sees and talks to, where he/ she goes.male privilege is displayed also: treating like a servant and making every decision. A very common abuse is threats: making threats to him/her to make them do illegal things. The final type of abuse that I will be talking about is responsibility abuse and is shown as: making the victim responsible for everything in life, bills, parenting, jobs around the house, things the abuser is meant to be responsible

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Abuse is a way of controlling someone. Minnie Wright was not always a quiet women. She used to be beautiful; she used to sing. She used to be happy. Minnie Wright, in Susan Glaspell’s

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An abusers brand of “love” is not typically what some might think; in fact, an abusers symbol of “love” are bruises, broken bones, or a red mark to where their

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The abuser manipulates the victim by utilizing their insecurities

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Is lacking empathy or compassion for you and others. Views you as an extension of themselves rather than as an individual. Emotional Blackmail Escalates abusive language or behavior if you talk back. Uses guilt trips or shaming to get his or her way.

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