Chemical, Psychological, And Evolutionary Reasons For Love

Grace Kearney

Erickson- 3

Research Paper- First Draft

27 February 2018

The Science of Love: The Chemical, Psychological, and Evolutionary Reasons for Love

Humans are obsessed with what Andrew Trees refers to as the “Romantic Storyline,” and its four stages: meet, fall in love, the object of one’s affections falls in love back, and the couple is in pure bliss to the end of their days (1). The reality is, though, that life rarely allows love to develop so easily. This quote from Trees sums up our ridiculous fixation on love perfectly, explaining how people “lavish vast amounts of time and effort and money on the search, but... almost half of us will end up divorcing that same person we worked so hard to find, and … begin the search all over again”

The third stage and ultimatum of love, is the attachment phase, characterized by the chemicals oxytocin and vasopressin. Oxytocin is the main chemical to promote bonding to romantic partners, children, and family members. Oxytocin is so powerful, it is nicknamed the “cuddle hormone.” It is released in sex, breastfeeding, and childbirth, which may seem a strange assortment of activities, but makes sense for bonding, as one would want to be bonded to one’s romantic partner and children. Unfortunately, these chemicals can become dangerous and detrimental to one’s relationships if produced in too large of quantities. For example, too much dopamine or oxytocin can cause irrational behavior, binge eating, drug use, adultery, and jealousy (Wu). Oxytocin can also cause outsiders to seem even more different by drawing people closer to their neighbors, leading to xenophobia, and dopamine can cause a love

This can be exemplified by today’s flirting versus the courting rituals of the nineteenth century, as well as the effects of modern education on American love lives. For example, the average American woman marries at 25, but the same woman with a college degree would marry two years later. Add a master’s or professional degree, and the age hops to 30. The further these women take their education, the further they will likely take their careers, and the more money they will likely earn. All of these factors add up to a lesser chance of marriage, as men tend to marry women who are younger, less educated, and earn less money than