Abusive Relationships

Abusive relationships have never been simple, they have a complex interaction between people.

Often this is not only between two people but more, children can be included in the situation. The role a man plays in a relationship has a far-reaching hold on a woman. Often the woman is financially dependent on the man, because he has a full reign on all the money, which comes in and out of the household. The man may have put all business transactions in his name, and his abusive nature may go as far as taking, any money the woman might earn.

Other factors can and will come into play in this sort of scenario. The woman may feel ashamed of the abuse that she has received. She doesn’t want to complain about her husband, and fears what might happen

The woman may have become so reliant on the man that to face independence is a traumatic outcome. She may have lost the survival skills necessary to function alone, and will stay because even though there is abuse. She is better off with the man. Also, if there are children involved the woman may fear what this will do to her kids. Destroying the family unit will have an effect on everybody. The man will create an illusion that he will change after inflicting abuse on the woman. Giving her hope that things will get better in the future, and giving him another chance. Just when it looks like she has had enough he may back off, and beg for forgiveness. Sobbing and crying are tactics that will play on the woman in an emotional way. Further keeping her locked in this cycle of abuse. She wants a healthy relationship and he promises her he will provide that, but then resorts to the old ways again. This pattern is common.

The woman may simply love the man especially if they have been together for a long time. There will obviously be memories when life with her man was just wonderful. Those moments when everything just felt the best and he had a way which she couldn’t resist. The woman may hold on

And the feeling of isolation may make her fears grow further, creating an anxiety that she can’t control. Her self-esteem and self-confidence has taken a dramatic turn, she may be left feeling worthless and stupid and inconsiderate which have been brought on by her abuser.

However, all of this does seem hopeless but there can and will be light at the end of the tunnel. First the woman must realise and recognise that there is a form of abuse, even if nothing physical has occurred and no bruises have formed. Abuse can manifest in many ways from the way the person talks to the actions they take. The person in the abusive relationship should reach out for help, from a friend or family member or somebody in authority. Explaining what is going on and she must not feel ashamed about doing this, abuse is wrong, and nobody should live like that. If the woman knows there is abuse she could try and address any underlying issues in the relationship. Get to the root of the problem if possible and try to communicate. Also use a computer that the abuser will not have access to, this way the abuser will not be able to monitor the victim’s