Pamela Druckerman once said, “To be a different kind of parent, you don’t just need a different parenting philosophy. You need a very different view of what a child actually is” (Druckerman, 2014, p. 9). Bringing Up Bébé by Pamela Druckerman is a unique book that explores the cultural differences between French parenting and American parenting practices. Druckerman, who is an American, is living in Paris observing and documenting how French parents raise their children. In this paper, I will analyze how this book demonstrates the theory of homeostatic functioning and boundaries. For family relationships, I will present how parent-child relationships and marital relationships are established by French parenting.
Family System Theory Throughout
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They were cheerful, socially responsible, self-reliant, achievement oriented, and cooperative with adults and peers” (Joseph & John, 2008). French parenting often sticks to the authoritative parenting style because it teaches children what is appropriate within the family system. When comparing this to American parenting, parents seem to foster their children's individuality and independence, which can be seen to lead to a more permissive parenting …show more content…
Conflict can be viewed as a bad thing, but it can positively impact relationships by creating opportunities for couples to show their commitment and love through sacrifice, constructive conflict, and communication (The Pennsylvania State University, 2023). Knowing how to effectively handle a conflict is not only important for a couple's relationship, but for the overall well-being of the child as well. A benefit of handling conflict in a constructive way is that it increases children’s emotional security, which supports positive adjustment over time (Bergman, Cummings, & Warmuth, 2016). In the book, French parenting uses a unique style of communication to resolve conflict. If French parents disagree on something, they pretend to agree in front of the child. By doing this, it is allowing for French parents to build complicity (Druckerman, 2014, p. 349). This connects with stone-walling in the sense that both partners are disengaging from the issue as they come to an agreement.
Additionally, Druckerman noted the importance of maintaining a strong marital relationship even after the child has arrived. French parents are more likely to prioritize date nights and spend time together as a couple. The emphasis on keeping a healthy marital relationship is seen as beneficial for both parents and the children. French