How Does Holden Present Grief In Catcher In The Rye

Narrative of Learning Essay Catcher in the Rye Faith Moore
When I first began reading ‘Catcher in the Rye’ by J.D. Salinger, I viewed Holden as blindly aggressive and rude, but the further I read, I began to recognize Holden’s character development through his grief. Grief is a very difficult feeling to deal with. Grief can bring out the worst in people and, at times, can ultimately lead to becoming a stronger version of yourself. I relate to Holden on many different levels. Holden was seen to push people away and self-sabotage when in the midst of his grief. I feel that I tend to do the same. I have trouble dealing with my own grief, whether that grief is caused by myself or others, and I tend to begin to sever relationships

As I stated earlier on, at first I did not appreciate Holden’s character. I thought he was aggressive, rude, and a tad bit cruel, especially with his attitude and the tendency to classify those around him in such a way that prevents him from truly getting to know others and experience what they are able to bring into his life. The further I read, especially towards the end with more coming into the light I started to realize that Holden is not a cruel or overly judgmental person, he is just broken. The more I analyzed Holden’s character, the more I was able to see myself through the trail of his words and actions. Holden is undoubtedly misunderstood by those around him but through no fault but his own. He pushes people away due to the sudden traumatic loss of his brother. Holden ends up learning not to push people away and to slowly let people back in. As he stated, “if somebody at least listens, it’s not too bad” (pg. 224). Thankfully, I have never experienced a physical loss in my life as of now. I tend to push those around me away in an attempt to preserve my feelings and ensure that I won’t get hurt. Seeing Holden’s character development (I would love to see how he continues to heal further throughout his lifetime) has inspired me to branch out even a baby step more. I feel that recognizing how incredibly toxic his behavior was toward himself, allowed me to understand that in an attempt to protect myself, close to how he does, I am only robbing myself from more experience and love. In isolating myself, I am only creating an internal battle that I keep allowing to continue as time moves forward. Although I was not a fan of Holden toward the beginning of the book, the more I learned about him and was able to sympathize with him, the more I was able to understand him. I learned to have a soft spot for Holden even though he made it near impossible. The worst struggle is having nobody to go to when in a clear