Throughout the course of the book, it’s identifiable how Xiomara’s relationships affect her identity. In many cases, her reactions in certain situations reflect her relationships with those around her. Her mother, father, and Aman all possessed a significant influence on Xiomara's lifestyle. For instance, her tendency to secrecy, her capacity for reticence, and her tendency to revert to her previous behavior.
The first relationship that Xiomara has that has a significant impact on her is with her mother. The bond between Xiomara and her mother is incredibly difficult. Xiomara's mother will say things like “‘Cuero,’ she calls me to my face. The Dominican word for ho.” or will just abuse her for not following her rules. Similar to when Xiomara’s mom found out that she was kissing a boy on the train. She made her kneel on rice and talk to Father Sean. She also said, “This is why you want to go away for college so you can open your legs for any boy with a big enough smile.” This demonstrates how it decreases Xiomara's propensity to communicate with others. She writes her poems for that reason. Following this incident, Xiomara began to act distant and stop communicating with others. “I spend every class writing in my journal. Ms. Galiano sends me to the guidance
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In the poem called “On Papi” it said “Just because your father's present, doesn't mean he isn't absent” How she thinks and makes decisions is reflected in her connection with her father. When she’s getting punished by her mom, her dad just goes with it and doesn’t defend her. An example of this affecting her is in the poem “In Front of My Locker” when she says, “He’s not going to throw a punch. He’s not going to curse or throw a fit. He’s not going to do a damn thing. Because no one will ever take care of me but me.” This shows that based on the relationship she has with her father makes her unable to rely on