Knapp's Stages Of Romantic Development

Six years in a relationship you begin to reminisce on how the relationship developed, and how you got as far as you are. At only 21 years old I have been in a serious relationship now for the past 6 years. There have been ups, and downs, and everything else in between. It wasn’t until taking Interpersonal Communication that I got a better in depth understanding of how romantic relationships form and change over time based on Knapp’s stages of romantic development. Throughout this paper I will be going over why we form relationships, Knapp’s stages of romantic development, the research I have found on studies conducted based on romantic relationships, and personal experience. Interpersonal communication has a significant effect on individuals

Studies show that some relationships are based on the exchange theory, based on seeking a relationship on the outcomes they desire. They factor in tangible and intangible rewards, and use comparison levels to decide whether or not the relationship is worth it. Competency is another factor in relationships. We are drawn to people who are competent enough that we can hold a conversation with them, but are turned off to those who are overly competent and ended up making us feel threatened by them. It is proven that we generally like those who show imperfections because we can relate to them and won’t feel overly threatened by them. Proximity plays a huge role in developing relationships. It is very likely to become attracted to and have feelings for someone who you spend a lot of time with. People tend to start relationships with co-workers because they spend a lot of time together and have some similarities of working with one another. It is proven that you are more likely to generate strong feelings towards those who you see regularly, you interact with them for long periods of time and anxiety levels are usually lowered. And lastly, there is self-disclosure. Self-disclosure definitely played a huge role in my relationship. It is very important if you are able to self-disclose in someone else, it means you trust them enough, and for me that is very important. It doesn’t work in every relationship and the feelings

Mark Knapp described this process in his 10 staircase steps: initiating, experimenting, intensifying, bonding, differentiating, circumscribing, stagnating, avoiding, and terminating. (Mark Knapp) These 10 steps are broken down into three areas, coming together, relational maintenance, and coming apart. This model managed to feature disclosure and depth, and studies show that, “Relationships are seen as developing and advancing through increased disclosure with increased depth. Once one person shares information with another, the view of the other person in relation to oneself is advanced to a new level.” (S-A Welch) Going through each of the 10 steps, initiating is the first step where you keep the conversation and interaction short but show that you are interested. If both parties are still interested, you move up to experimenting. This is where “small talk” comes into play. You are interested in this other person and want to see if the connection will go any further. Studies show that these two stages occur more online, or via cellphones. This is still the early stages and some people are not good with small talk, so they feel more comfortable communicating over the internet or on the phone. Facebook was rated the number one social media site in 2011 and is the perfect site for meeting new people and communicating with them. There are many areas on Facebook where you