Masculinity In John Eldredge's Wild At Heart

Masculinity has become an important subject as its definition seems to be relatively ambiguous in the modernity, provoking an identity crisis. What sort of universal male characteristics and values do people expect from men? Do men still endure the standards that they held in the past, or have those standards changed? In a society as diverse as ours, it is onerous to find any universal standard by which males are expected to obey. The continuity between male identity characteristics is hard to define as it pertains to the human physiological and psychological nature. According to Paechter, it is difficult to label a person by male and female genders because it says minimal about their masculinity and femininity (Paechter, p. 261). Our ideals

The attributes of what makes a “real man” such as domination, power, physical strength and emotional constraint have been replaced by a new idea of gender roles constructed on partnership and equity. The deprivation of the previous identity of “manhood” seems to induce not only confusion but a crisis in masculinity.

John Eldredge the author of the book "Wild at Heart," explains that men and women have emotional desires distinctly different to meet the need of the opposite sex. He claims that men need the struggle to combat, an adventure to live, and a belle to rescue, similarly, women desire to be fought for, to share with him an adventure, and be the belle he rescues (Eldredge). Although these characteristics are played out in childhood throughout games such as "Cowboys and Indians" or playing "Prince and Princess," these attributes are crucial to both sexes through adulthood. By denying men and women of basic desires, feelings of meaninglessness, alienation, and powerlessness appear. For men, it enters the sphere of danger, and violence (Hunt, p. 473). In the performing arts, masculine roles are an image of heroism; the accumulation of goods, adornment, appearance

The documentary “Tough Guise: Violence, Media, and the Crisis in Masculinity,” by Jackson Katz, explain that men learn how to be “real men” when they were still young boys. Katz explicates the vision of “real man” is greatly related to whom is the most “strong, powerful, physical, independent, respected, masculine and tough” (Katz). Anyone who does not imitate this category is likely to be labeled as “soft, little mama’s boy, emotional, girly, or weak” (Katz). Katz also explains that these men idea of masculinity came up from their family, community, but above all from the media. He states that the media portrays men through illustrations that connect masculinity to the ability to control and aggressiveness. Some heterosexual men find difficulty in trying to accept the new approach of gender roles based on partnership and egalitarianism of men and women. The sense of not meeting ideal standards set by media such as advertisements, Hollywood films, and porn movies provoke defensive reactions in men