Patron Saints Of Nothing By Kennedy Ribay

Great expectations can lead to great disappointments, or great misunderstandings. The influence of others’ expectations creates an internal struggle between upholding the assumptions of society and acting out through personal interest. In Patron Saints of Nothing by Randy Ribay, Jay takes it upon himself to uncover the truth about his cousin’s death—yet buries the truth of the rest of his family through assumed expectations. Grace, Jay’s other cousin, still grieving her brother’s death, has unfair expectations of others to uphold despite her internal turmoil. In my own life, I’ve grappled with the expectations of myself based off unfair or shallow beliefs. These expectations result in others ignoring the sincerity of my character and instead

Shallow assumptions and narrow expectations cause a person to hide secrets from those they love, yet once they reveal their secrets, their true character shines through. After being sent out by Tito Maning to visit monuments and educate her cousin on Philippine culture, Grace instead takes Jay to the mall to meet her friends. On the way to the mall, Jay notices that Grace is “staring at a phone in her hand,” despite Tito Maning not allowing Grace to have a phone (114). Later when arriving at the mall and meeting with Grace’s friends, Jay sees “Grace [takes] Jessa’s hand,” and subsequently receives confirmation from Grace that they are a couple (117). Grace immediately tells Jay to “not tell anyone... not even [his] family.” (134). Tito Maning expects Grace to take Jay to a monument, but instead she breaks away from her assumed obedience to her father by taking Jay to the mall. She further suspends Tito Maning’s expectations of her by harboring a “secret phone” and having a relationship with a girl—something Tito Maning has shamed her aunts for doing

When finally expressing grief for her brother, she “starts to cry,” yet “it is soft and quiet. The world after a storm.” (261). By comparing Grace’s cries to “the world after a storm” Ribay further illustrates Grace’s inability to show grief to uphold expectations. By crying “after a storm,” Grace’s grief is hushed and subdued rather than loud and angry, because Grace did not have the chance to be loud and angry, instead narrow expectations constrained her to push through the storm and show no sign of weakness. When “the storm” finally passed, Grace’s cries were soft because she felt as if her grief and emotions should be hushed. Coinciding with Grace, after having my parents separate, I felt as if I could not grieve or be upset because I had too many standards and expectations to uphold. Rather than give myself time to process and feel my emotions, I instead told no one about my situation and pushed myself even harder. I kept my struggle and my pain a secret from my friends in order to uphold expectations I believed I had to