Who knew that something so beautiful could be so difficult? At age 14, adoption stepped into my world. I had supportive parents who worked hard to educate my brothers and I at home. I had close relationships with my 3 younger brothers. And now adoption brought another little boy into my life. After struggling in his original, adopted home for a year Elias came to live with my family. He was ten years old. From Ethiopia to Texas, Elias landed with my family in Kentucky. To me adoption was a new adventure, an exciting new page in my story. I was ecstatic to have a new brother. However, I never expect the challenge adoption would bring.
As the oldest child, I obviously squabbled with my brothers, but ultimately I loved them and knew they looked up to me. Somehow I expected my relationship to be the same with Elias. I quickly learned that he did not look up to me; He didn’t even like me. I had prepared to be welcoming and kind to my new brother, but I did not expect him to scorn and ignore me. Culturally, in Ethiopia women are not held in high regard, and partially, because of his background Elias wanted nothing to do with me. I struggled between spite and compassion, trying to defend myself but also remembering the difficult life
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Despite the annoyances or difficulties, we were brother and sister. Unfortunately, in Africa Elias was a victim of sexual abuse and because my mom was black he struggled being around her. When my parents realized that this was an issue, they began to search for a new home for Elias, a home where he would have a white mother. My whole family felt defeat, after a year of struggling to adjust Elias to our home, he had to leave my family. Providence prevailed, when after weeks of searching we found a white family who was familiar with adoption. Furthermore, they lived near to a counselor, who specialized in sexual abuse. Elias left our home, but not our life he is thriving with his new