The voices coil around my brain finding every crevice and gap sneaking through my synaptic wonderland, like smoke they have no substance… I cannot grasp them… I cannot understand them and yet they fill my skull, the pressure of their nonexistence crushes my thoughts until they must be siphoned through a pinhole. Perhaps they will cause my head to burst and my thoughts will spill out on the pavement in a menagerie of liquid brain matter…crack, CRACK, CRACK its happening...blessed relief… The breath of a drowning man brings me back to life, shaking I sit up running my hands through my drenched hair. My tee-shirt sticks to my chest and for a moment I believe I’ve washed ashore on a tropic island… until the stench hits me. The smell as familiar to me as a close friend. The one that permeates my very being day and night, the one that seeps from my pores and shocks my heart into an uneven rhythm. It's name is fear and we are well acquainted. Drawing ragged droughts of air, I hang my feet from the side of the bed. My head takes its que from my heart adopting and uneven throb. I stare at the object of my fear, only 15 steps from the bed is a door. Hair raising, leg weakening fear alludes to the inevitable knocking. I can’t remember what lies beyond it but I know whatever is hiding behind it wants me to sleep. Sleep the ultimate release, …show more content…
Cupping my hands, I catch the flow splashing it over my face and through hair. The cool liquid numbs the throbbing in my head, freezing the thoughts that push against the back of my eyes. I swish some in my mouth spiting red, I must have bit my tongue again. Leaving the bathroom, I watch the door never turning my back to it just in case. The box of Happy Times granola bars is almost empty; it was full yesterday. It was full, my hands begin to shake and my stomach clenches. Bile burns in the back of my throat. It was here. It ate my