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Pinpa Monologue

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Hi, um, my name’s Phil. I’m a peanut. Yep, just a peanut, not anything special like a dog with a family to love or even an almond, which is actually a nut. Nope, I’m just a little peanut trying to live as long as I can before somebody scoops me up, plops me in a bag, and takes me home to be a nice after-school snack. Now you might be wondering, How do you have thoughts, you’re just a peanut? Well, you know what? I don’t know how I have thoughts; like I said, I’m just waiting to be eaten. Bear with me here because I am here to tell you the story of how I lost my girlfriend, Pippa.
I’m not going to lie, I was in love—like deep love. Pippa was everything you could ask for: beautiful, smart, and the best part was that she was an almond. Like I

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