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Relationships Between Mothers And Daughters In The Help By Kathryn Stockett

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Recommended: What impacts our identity formation

Nicole Reimer
Ms. Robbins
ENG 4U1-03
13 Jan. 2023
The Touch of Mothers The relationships formed between mothers and daughters in The Help by Kathryn Stockett influenced the daughters for their entire lives. Starting in 1962, Aibileen Clark worked for Elizabeth Leefolt, mostly taking care of her daughter, Mae Mobley Leefolt, who was constantly ignored by her mother as a toddler. Eugenia Phelan, or Skeeter, struggles with the recent loss of her childhood maid, Constantine, and with her mother, Mrs. Charlotte Phelan, who disapproves of Skeeter’s appearance and her desire to become an author instead of a housewife. Disturbed by the racism occurring in Jacksonville, Mississippi, Skeeter decides to write a book telling the struggles black maids …show more content…

Phelan’s expectations placed on her daughter affects Skeeter’s image of herself. Charlotte Phelan wanted Skeeter to get married and have children while she was still young, but Skeeter’s appearance was not acceptable enough to her in order for her to believe that Skeeter could actually engage with a man. Mrs. Phelan made Skeeter feel extremely self-conscious about her height, her hair, and her clothes by constantly commenting on her appearance and height, booking her hair appointments, trying out new hairstyles on her to make her appear shorter, or by sending her shopping. On top of her disapproval of Skeeter’s appearance, Charlotte Phelan made sure that Skeeter knew she disapproved of her idea to get a job as a writer, and not as a housewife and mother which was society’s norm in the 1960s. She criticized Skeeter’s choice of education by saying, “ ‘Four years my daughter goes off to college and what does she come home with? … A pretty piece of paper’ ”(Stockett 64). Because of this constant disapproval, Skeeter felt insecure and as if no one would ever be truly proud of her. This caused her to continually lie to her mother about the places she went to or the people she was hanging out with. It only ruined their relationship even more because Skeeter was treating her mother with the same disrespect she was being treated with. Skeeter’s insecurities made her feel left behind in her family (Stockett 66) since she no longer fit into her mother’s expectations of being a housewife. Her priorities changed from getting married to following her own desires of becoming a writer. This feeling of being left behind was not uncommon as Rachel Hubbard points out in an article about women in the 1900s, “Some women who wanted to live differently would begin to think that they were failures and become depressed. Most of these women were wealthy and well-educated” (Hubbard). This was similar to Skeeter’s situation as she wanted to be different from society, had

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She tells Skeeter that people don't actually tell her the truth, and she says that people are afraid of her and will never like Skeeter. “They hate you.” Skeeter replies, “You don’t have any idea what the other woman have told me”(Stockett 305). Gretchen says that all these maids show fear and hate toward Skeeter. Although Skeeter is white, she actually cares a lot about

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The start, Abileene went through the stage of realization. She dealt with her difficult times by praying and creating friendships. She became closer to Skeeter, a young white aspiring journalist, by sharing her stories and experiences with her. By doing this, Abileene grew as a person by becoming more comfortable speaking up for herself. By speaking with Skeeter and being a part of the writing of her book, she becomes more bold.

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In The Help by Kathryn Stockett, Skeeter Phelan and Stuart Whitworth have many twists and turns in their relationship. Skeeter Phelan is a very privileged young white woman in Jackson, Mississippi. Her family owns a cotton farm and they make a good living off of it. She is tall and has hair that is hard to manage. Although she is a white woman in the south in the 1960’s she doesn’t act like the other women do.

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Skeeter is a compassionate supporter of equal rights. While other members of the elite white class treat their help disdainfully by restricting their rights at work or issuing demands impersonally such as when a husband harshly says “make me a sandwich” to Clark (The Help), Skeeter is amiable and frequently greets them or talks to them during in the kitchen during social events. Additionally, Skeeter has a profound connection to the black woman, Constance, who took care of her during her childhood and weeps when her mother tells her that has died. After the book is released, Skeeter faces anger from other members of the white upper class, this is seen when Minnie tells Skeeter to go to New York for a job opportunity because, “You ain’t got nothing left here but enemies in the Junior League” (The Help). The Junior League is a philanthropic organization whose membership is traditionally comprised of upper class females, and the movie features several junior league events and meetings; the women that Skeeter has most angered belong to this organization with Skeeter.

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In comparison, Skeeter's work revolutionizes the world of a major group. When trying to convince Aibelen to help her write the book she explains that showing the perspective of the help, a previously undocumented point of view, can help people understand what they experience (Taylor). As shown later in the film, the book showcases the lives of different African American maids and increases their visibility. By doing so people begin to question if the way the maids have been treated is ethical or not. The book was a major part of helping the civil rights movement.

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Although Atticus faces disapproval from members of the community for defending Tom, he was determined to do his job to the best of his ability, and worked with what he had. Conversely, Skeeter from The Help is a writer who works at the Jackson Journal, in the housekeeping column, and she uses this as a tunnel to give black maids a voice in her community. For example, Charlotte comes into the room and tells Skeeter she needs to focus on finding a husband instead of wasting her time on writing. In response, Skeeter says she wants to do something important with her life and

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She wishes to get a job related to writing and journaling. On the other hand, most of her friends and her mother wishes for Skeeter to become a proper lady. This includes marrying and staying home to raise a child. This eventually leads Skeeter to argue with her mother a couple of times. Furthermore, many of the people in her town could have thought that Skeeter was homosexual, a very insulting condition at that time.

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By an anonymous writer later revealed as Skeeter also known as Eugenia Phelan. Skeeter, a white woman, returns to her hometown (Mississippi) to discover that her motherly nanny Constantine has left but no one tells what happened. Soon Skeeter realizes the injustice her society practices and decides to write a book where voices of black will be raised. She approaches Aibileen for sharing her narrative to which Aibileen responds positively and also let’s Minny in their secret. Minny, Aibileen’s friend, another black help, reveals a secret about Miss Hilly that ensures Miss Hilly’s silence after the publication of their writing project.

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Skeeter is seen to develop in two different ways: a young woman who doesn 't have marriage as a first priority anymore and a woman who later sees an injustice to the black help. Skeeter is a white socialite who just graduated from college with a degree in writing. She came back to Jackson Mississippi with the idea of starting to write for book publishing companies but arrives home only for her mother to question her about marriage. Upon the many

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After Skeeter is addressed that way, “most turned their heads to see if Skeeter had the gall to show up”. The community had expected her to withdraw her participation because she had broken her mindless allegiance to Hilly Holbrook. By Skeeter breaking that allegiance to Hilly Holbrook she had broken any ties she could have had to the Caucasian community in Jackson. When Skeeter tried to associate with some Caucasian ladies at a Junior League meeting, all backs had formed a wall to her. When Skeeter tried to associate with childhood friends, a look of embarrassment would come across their face for having to be in her company.

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Infancy and Childhood, September 25th, 2015). Since Skeeter’s appearance does not fit into the society’s gender schema, she often feels excluded, especially as all her friends are married and having babies. In lecture, this could be summed as peer rejection (N. Salahuddin, Becoming Gendered: Infancy and Childhood, September 25th, 2015). However, through her caring upbringing by her maid, Constantine, Skeeter learns to look outside the gendered schemas of society, and chooses to be who she feels is the best version of herself, even if it is different. Skeeter already sees herself as fitting outside society’s schema of being a woman, thus she does not feel pressured to conform to the other parts of the schema, such as being dainty or not

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For example, Eugenia 'Skeeter' Phelan utilises her courage to empower black maids and overcome social pressure.

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