LOSS, GRIEF AND HEALING As human beings, we suffer losses of many kinds and sizes in our life time. While some of these losses are small and do not hurt much, some are big and hurt deeply. Those that are accompanied by pains that are difficult to bear include the loss of a loved one through death or divorce, cheating or unfaithfulness in a trusted relationship or loss of good health when a diagnosis of a terminal illness is made. In all these instances of loss, pain and grief are experienced and an emotional wound is created which needs healing. To be able to know how to deal with the losses that are discussed in the following chapters, it is important to have a clearer understanding of loss and grief and how to cope with grief following …show more content…
The process of mourning is more external, public and cultural than grieving which is more internal and private. Some rituals are followed in some cultures when one is in mourning and these include the wearing of black garments during the period of mourning to communicate to the public that one is dealing with loss and is emotionally wounded. The positive side of grief The grief of loss is hurting and often unbearable. It is not easy to have a positive view of life when one is hurting. However, there is a positive side of grief if one looks for it. It is growth. One may grow in various ways out of loss and grief. Months or years after the grief experience when one has recovered from the emotional devastation, one can see traces of growth as a result of going through a painful experience. Some people are able to see positive changes as a result of the unfortunate situation. “The deep truth is that our human suffering need not be an obstacle to the joy and peace we so desire, but can become, instead, the means to it. The great secret of the spiritual life, the life of the Beloved Sons and daughters of God, is that everything we live, be it gladness or sadness, joy or pain, health or illness, can all be part of the journey toward the full realization of our humanity” Henri