Summary Of A Complicated Kindness

If You Love Someone, Set Them Free:

The Significance of Miriam Toews’s “A Complicated Kindness” Miriam Toews’s “A Complicated Kindness” follows the life of narrator Nomi Nickel and her struggle with finding herself and her own faith in her small Mennonite community of East Village. During the course of the novel, the Nickels family is essentially torn apart due to the harsh beliefs of their Mennonite community, resulting in Nomi’s sister, mother, and father to leave their church behind and venture to other places. Ironically, the members of the Nickels family did not leave their family behind in self-interest, but out of love. Essentially, the significance of the complicated kindness is the decision of Tash, Trudie, and Ray to leave in order

Through Nomi’s recounts of her sister’s departure form East Village, Tash gradually begins to rebel against the social norms of the community, from her clothing to sneaking out of the village to go to the city library. Eventually it became evident that Tash was meant for greater things outside the Mennonite church and staying would only keep her from reaching her true potential. This can be seen when Mr. Quiring visits the Nickels household and explains to Mr. and Mrs. Nickels that it’s a shame that there’s no place in the community to express herself fully. In response Trudie Nickels tells her husband “that even Almon Quiring could see that Tash didn’t belong in this town” (117). From this point, Tash continues to struggle with the Mennonite community wearing her down until she finally breaks free one night. Trudie realizes that Tash can’t be stuck in the community when she is destined for greater things and helps her leave town with her Ian, Tash’s boyfriend. Although losing her child is tough, Trudie let Tash go off into world outside of their church and be free as opposed to forcing her to stay confined in the community and always feeling like an outsider. This can be seen when Nomi recounts the story her mother tells her about “the Mennonites in Russia fleeing in the middle of the night, scrambling madly to find a place, any place, where they’d be free” (148). Essentially, Tash is much like the Mennonites fleeing from Russia in order to find freedom. She may not want to leave her family behind, but it’s much better for her to live her on life than to stay with her family and making them feel like the cause for her misery. Thus, Tash leaving her family and Trudie letting her go was their very own act of a complicated kindness, as they both sacrificed being with one another, and Tash being with the rest of her family, so that Tash has