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The Theme Of Abusive Relationships

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Family abuse is a growing problem worldwide. More and more often we hear various and often horrifying stories about people getting abused in a relationship regardless of their gender. The reason for abusive relationships come from the need to acquire and maintain power and control over a partner. Abusers are convinced they have the right to control and limit their partners and they may enjoy the feeling of having power and may act with jealousy or control over their partner. This is why I have chosen to discuss the theme of abusive relationships because I believe this certain theme should be spoken about as it's a realistic matter in life that many people, especially women suffer. This theme is shown in the following texts, the novel It Ends …show more content…

This film similarly portrays an abusive and brutally obsessed husband, Martin. This film also conveys the following theme abusive relationships following through Martin and Laura’s relationship. This is demonstrated by Martin’s desire for complete control and order which results in violence against Laura when that control and order gets taken. This is shown when Martin realises the towels were unevenly placed on the rack and takes Laura inside and states “ Well, we all forget things. That’s what reminding is for.” Martin’s actions and his line reflects on how abusers are controlling and want their partner to obey and listen to their commands. Martin also states “ I love you, Laura. I can’t live without you. And I won’t let you live without me.” This conveys that abusers are manipulative to their partner as for instance, Martin making Laura feel guilty. Throughout this film the watchers can anticipate that Martin is a possessive and obsessive husband having the ideal vision of Laura all to himself without any distractions. This links to the way Martin believed that Laura had been flirting with the neighbour, and as punishment he physically beats her. Unfortunately abusers believe that they have the right to control and restrict their partners life which can be clearly demonstrated in this film. Nevertheless, no one should ever be made to feel that way by a partner in a relationship by reflecting on the novel, …show more content…

In the text Jun Hoe Kok demonstrates an abusive relationship with the abuser being the husband. This is shown in the text by how the husband gets mad when he doesn’t get the right soup that he demands and states, “You’re so useless! I can’t believe I even decided to marry you!” Likewise in It Ends With Us and Sleeping With The Enemy, this shows that the only reason abusers are married is that they expect their partner to obey them and not go against their wishes. As the wife is making the soup, “She prepares quietly, knowing that if things aren’t done right, she might be hurt again.” This demonstrates that in abusive relationships, the partner knows that they cannot do things the way that their abuser doesn’t like or they will get punished if it is not done right. This reflects on the controlling and manipulative mindset demonstrated in The Abusive Husband as in Sleeping With The Enemy, the husband got angry at his wife for the towels being unevenly placed and in The Abusive Husband, the husband didn’t like the soup because it tasted not to his liking and blamed his wife. This portrays that abusers view their partner as a tool to them for their main purpose and that abusers are only in the relationship to benefit themselves. Jun Hoe kok’s purpose of this short story is to demonstrate to society the power and control abusers have over their partner.

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For instance, controlling abuse is the way that an abusive person gains and maintains power and control over the person. In the essay it states “An abusive partner is controlling. They are manipulative. They might make a special point of coyly sharing information that they actually know will upset you”.

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The power and control wheel, a tool used when trying to educate victims of IPV, is symbolically represented throughout the book by demonstrating how these abusers keep control of their partners. This wheel details eight forms of violence that abusers commonly use to keep control over their partner, that include, using male privilege and coercion and threats to maintain dominance (Burgess et al., 2012, p. 300). Victimology also studies, the effects such patterns of abuse have on an individual, such as learned helplessness and PTSD (Burgess et al., 2012, p. 300). Furthermore, it is grounded in the approaches and steps of action to take in order to help victims of trauma and

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