Insomnia is utterly scary. Not only is it difficult to fall asleep at night, but it's also hard to stay asleep. You nod off eventually then, suddenly I'm wide awake but still tired and drowsy. A thought filled hour passes and I fall asleep again. 30 minutes later, the cycle just keeps repeating itself. For an insomniac, this goes on day after day and month after month. You feel as though you can not escape the mounting stress and anxiety you face throughout the day. Some days are much harder than others, for me it was the worst during deadlines like budget meetings and progress reports, but after the meeting is over, my insomnia just kicks in.
Some nights, I was exhausted by as early as 8 pm. so I turn in hoping for a good night's rest. So, I close my eyes and lay in my bed.
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The thought is stupid and trivial but that's how it starts, thinking about the stupidest things that happened that day.
Hours later, I’m still awake. At some brief moment, I must have fallen asleep as my wife opens the curtains and I know it’s time for me to head to work yet again. I must have had, about 2 hours of actual sleep?
Not so great when you have a month-end sales meeting. And it’s probably not good to drive today, I think. This morning, I’m really tired. I’m really worried, not for my own safety, but for the danger, I present to other motorists. The cycle just repeats itself night after night.
I felt, at one point, that I'd take any amount of sleep over none at all. For an insomniac, It's a victory to get any sleep at