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I Love Monologue

642 Words3 Pages

“I kissed a girl and I liked it.” To this day I’ve never been able to pin point where these feelings came from. Awkwardly catching my self-gazing at some girl across the room as she runs her petite fingers through her glistening hair. When I began to play men’s hockey I’d nonchalantly observe the boys and “fan girl” over them with my friends, like any teenage girl. I’m not simply into girls; boys are also in my interest. In this very sentence I’m going to come out to myself, I am Bisexual. The amount of anxiety and discomfort it took for me to type that out was unbearable. Just typing, I am bisexual, makes me burst into tears and take it back, but I cant because it’s true. I was born this way. Please don't ask me to try dating the …show more content…

It's part of who I am and who I'm going to be. I can only love another boy or girl and I‘m so scared that people will hate me. I’ve been teased enough and heard so many hurtful things about being gay long before I realized I actually was. I'm so scared someone will tell me that the world will not like me, and that my religion will shun me, or that I’ll end up alone. I've already heard all of that before but hoped that someone who loves me would never say those things. I'm afraid other people will blame themselves and tell me it was because of too many days playing sports, spending too much time with girls from hockey, or that it has anything to do with how I’ve been raised. It …show more content…

You know sometimes when I’m quiet and someone asks me what I’m thinking or what’s wrong? That's me playing out my options. I know that the easiest route to avoid all of this would be to keep my secret to myself so I don't mess things up. I could act how society expects and find an opposite-sex spouse, marry and have a family. I know that’d make everyone happy. I’m sorry if it turns out that someone else’s happiness would be affected if I decided to pursue mine. I know that people might think that gay people can’t marry and have families. But we do and I don't want others to be worried. I only want for people to understand that the person I’ll love and who’ll take care of me might not be the picture others have in mind. I’ve been raised so well, and I’ve gotten so many opportunities. What I’ve told you right now doesn’t change my visions for happiness, a good career, or a happy home life. I’ve always been taught to be truthful, honest with myself and with others, so I hope people know that I can only be happy being true to myself. Maybe it's naive for me to hope that I could share my happiness with people when I find the one for me, or that people will accept me as I am, as well as the family that I hope to have one

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