Sharon Old Sex Without Love

Defined by Merriam-Webster, the simplest definition of love is “a feeling of strong or constant affection for a person” (Merriam-Webster), but love actually has many meanings in society. For some people it is a love for someone whose important to them, for others it is how they feel towards an object or thing, or sometimes love is such a strong feeling, people become cautious towards it. Love can stay the same or it can constantly change throughout people’s lives, but it plays an important role in everyday life. The theme of love is found everywhere, especially in poems. Over time different love poems explore societies and people’s attitudes towards love. One poet, Sharon Olds, wrote “Sex Without Love”, which describes what happens when love

A reader could interpret the poem positively, and explain that sexual relations without love can happen because of Old’s use of “positive” imagery of sex such as “beautiful as dancers, / gliding over each other like ice-skaters” (2-3), inferring that sexual relations is a beautiful experience, but if the reader looks deeper into the verses, Olds uses powerful similes to prove that sex is a beautiful thing, but it is not without love. The negative connotation of sex without love is thoroughly explained through the use of many similes, which grabs the reader’s attention. For example, the words and verses in the poem such as “like ice-skaters over the ice” (Olds 4) and “faces red as steak” (Olds 5-6) gives the reader an image of sex as cold and detached. On the ice, ice-skaters are together, but the only source of connection is their hands. Once in a while, ice skaters let go of their partner’s hands, and they are alone on the ice. A one-night sexual encounter is like ice-skaters on the ice, because they are together for only so long, and then they leave, without making any commitments. The simile of “faces red as steak” (olds 5-6), is a disturbing image because Olds’ is comparing two people’s red faces to a large, slimy, slab of meat. Instead of thinking a sexual relation without love is

The reader can read it positively, and infer that sexual relations without love can happen, and sex is just another form of exercise that gives pleasure to a person in that moment. But in fact, Olds use of a negative tone throughout the poem overshadows the positive. For example, the poem starts out negatively with Olds incredulously asking “How do they do it, the ones who make love/without love?” (1-2), meaning how do people have a sexual relation with someone without emotions on attachments. This verse is so powerful because it is the first line the readers start with, causing them to think about that question throughout the whole entire poem. The negative tone in the poem is further analyzed through the verses that explain the consequences of a sexual relation without love. For example, the verse that states “…wet as the/children at birth whose mothers are going to/give them away” () is explaining the irresponsibility of those people who decide to partake in a sexual relation without love. They are so caught up in the moment and looking for pleasure, that they do not think of the consequences. They could accidently conceive a child, not be ready for it, and make a haste decision without thinking. That one night of irresponsibility could affect the person for the rest of their life. Finally, verses 16-17, explains “they do not/mistake the lover for their own