Interpersonal Communication Assignment

For this assignment I had the opportunity to interview my best friend, Stephanie, and her boyfriend of five years, Zack. Watching these two individuals reflect and analyze past conflicts was not only insightful for me, but in a way, it was an emotionally healing experience for the couple as they got a chance to connect and understand each other on a deeper level. For the past year, Stephanie and Zack have been having constant conflict due to the fact that moving to Knoxville has been a challenging adaptational experience for Stephanie but not for Zack. Stephanie’s goals and aspirations has always been to live in a big city because that would allow her to have more opportunities to grow her career. Stephanie wants to move as soon as possible

Even though difference in goals may have influenced disagreement between the two parties, there were still many other factors like conflict styles and emotions that were also key motivators in the development of this interpersonal conflict. A strength that the couple admitted to having when it comes to managing a conflict is that they never surpass the boundary of being disrespectful to one another. Both individuals expressed that even though they have heated conversations, it never gets to a point that causes any verbal or physical harm to one another. When the first event of conflict about the moving situation occurred both parties understood that it had to do with a topical goal differences as they each wanted to have successful careers and because of the financial consequences that come from moving. As the conflict evolved, relational goals also surfaced as both individuals valued each other’s perspectives of the conflict and wanted to work together as a couple to find a way to fulfill these goals. “Goals recognize interdependence. In all conflicts, tension arises

The reason why I say that is because they respect and love each other very much. The fact that they have mutual respect allows them to disagree and communicate those disagreements in a healthy manner. That does not mean that they are perfect and have it one hundred percent figured out how to properly manage and resolve conflict. When it comes to the moving out of Knoxville conflict, there are a couple of areas where improvement is needed but overall, I am glad that they were able to meet in the middle and compromise. The fact that they were able to get to that point of compromise is a huge step towards the right direction. In order to prevent future conflict from happening, I think both individuals should consider getting help from a counselor or a third party when it comes their expressions of emotions. Since both individuals have very opposite ways of expressing their emotions, it essential for them to find ways in which they can adjust their communication to allow them to freely express themselves in ways that are both healthy and constructive. If I was to give individual recommendations to each party I would say that Stephanie needs to work on who she vents to when frustrated. “If you feel the need to vent, do it with a safe friend, a counselor, or designated third party, not the conflict partner with whom you are attempting to work” (p.217). Venting to Zack is dysfunctional because