Personal Statement

My first year of teaching was terrifying, so the relation to Bilbo and the dwarves’ transition to the Misty Mountains from the comfort and safety of Rivendell is very familiar to me. The safety net provided by being a student teacher allowed me to observe how a classroom operated with an experienced teacher; I was able to hide behind the protective shell of her while I summoned up the courage to teach a lesson. I had to teach lessons while student teaching, but it is nothing compared to having your own classroom and being responsible for a room full of your own students. I had the confidence any college student in the education program at the University of West Georgia would have: great GPA, great recommendations from my professors, and outstanding

The realization finally hit me that I was the one in charge of a room full of middle schoolers who would be MY responsibility. The future of their education in MY hands. This realization, or epiphany as I like to call it, shook me to my core; I had all the credentials of being a great student teacher, my grades were on point, but I was brought down to my knees after my first few weeks of being a “real” teacher. My first year directly correlates to how Bilbo felt when he entered the realm of the Misty Mountains from the comfort and rest of Rivendell. I felt like I was going uphill only to fall back down because I had no idea how to get through it. In late August, a major shift occurred in my career and personal life where I was forced to answer some questions that haunted me during my first weeks of teaching: Was I meant to do this? Could I do this? Am I good enough? The questions someone with confidence should not have to entertain. As I was contemplating on my next move, to keep trudging through the year or quit, I slowly, and when I mean slowly, I am not exaggerating, I finally realized that this is what I was meant to do. I soon learned that every teacher has had a “first year,” so I began to seek advice from veteran teachers on how to get through it all without losing my sanity. The advice and encouragement from those around me allowed me to get through days full of tears and anguish to

I was on the verge of quitting and giving up my dream career because of doubt and fear that I felt like I could not control. I had to reassess many times throughout that first year just to make sure I was on track. Many people have my undying respect and thanks because of what they have done or said to help me as a struggling first year teacher. I can relate to Bilbo’s role in the adventure as he is trying to make the determination of whether to go back to the comfort and safety of what he knows, or if he will choose to leave that comfort zone for something that will allow him to explore his own capabilities. Moving from what a person knows to something unknown is a major decision and can break a person’s spirit and drive to continue on, so it allows you took look inward to see what you are really made of as a person. Teaching was my version of transitioning to the Misty Mountains, and I am happy to say I was able to overcome many obstacles and trials to be the person and teacher I am today. Year five is almost here, so I can say with certainty that I did not become a victim of my own self-doubt and lack of confidence. I am by no means the perfect teacher, and I still have moments when I am climbing up the hill of questions and doubt, and sometimes I crack under the weight of it all, but then I get up the next morning and do it all over again expecting different results because I know I