Topics: Did I address all of the topics described in the assignment instructions? b. Paragraph construction: Did I start each paragraph with a clear topic sentence? Did I follow the topic sentence with supporting details? Click on the link for tips on How to Write a Good Paragraph. c. Length:
In the article, “College Pressures,” William Zinsser discusses the many struggles college students face while trying to focus on their studying. He convinces the reader of his point by using different types of rhetorical strategies. Zinsser’s usage of the rhetorical strategies such as getting straight to the point, quoting, paragraphing, the use of word pictures, and choosing a title was effectively done in his article to persuade his reader of the struggles faced by college students. The author did not waste anytime getting to the main point in his article, which is effective because it makes me interested in what he had to say.
I referred to unit 7’s discussion post where you outlined your essay. So far your research has proven to make for an interesting essay. I’m sorry I did not find a persuasive thesis statement in Unit 8 though, meaning I’m not convinced that there should be a policy change. I know you stated this is a working thesis statement which was not included in unit 8’s post. If you don’t mind, I would like to give some guidance.
Make sure it is in a distant and formal third person. Remember, just the facts. Do not critique it or offer personal insight...yet. Paragraph 2 is a brief analysis. Consider
The points are all set up and made but they do not go into depth enough to make a solid argument of how impactful the people Dillon’s quotations of other people add credibility to his argument. By explaining the points i'm making and how they impact the audience it should add to my paper point rather than sounding like a side note. A small fix to improve the last body paragraph would be to touch up the transition into it instead of using “In the article there are many people, from corporate America and from educational writing places, referenced to make Dillon seem more credibility to his audience and make his argument more persuasive.”. The conclusion would wrap up the paper nicely if I had properly analyzed throughout the rest of the paragraphs.
It seems like the classmate did a good job in grammar, spelling and proof reading. I didn’t see any grammatical errors throughout the essay. Overall, this is a well written essay and I didn’t see any problems. 7.
Essay 1 must be executed in a particular way. MLA format is one example that should be used in Essay 1, thus depicts how the paper will look. Moreover, it must reach a minimum length of two pages and six hundred words. The essay must include at least 5 paragraphs with 3 or more being the detailed body paragraphs. Equally important, the introductory paragraph needs an underlined, well-written thesis.
100 years ago, the attempted annihilation of an entire race known as the Armenian genocide began. From 1914 - 1922, the massacres perpetrated by the government of Young Turks and later the Kemalist government aimed to eliminate all Armenians living in the Ottoman Empire (Armenian Genocide Museum - Institute). A population which had lived in the same region for centuries suddenly became nearly extinct. As for the cause, the outbreak of World War I provided the Young Turks an opportunity to solve the “Armenian question.” The Armenian question refers to the defence and liberty as well as fair treatment of Armenians during the disintegration of the Ottoman Empire (United Human Rights Council).
Additionally, in paragraph 3, when he says, “Concerns regarding student indebtedness and educational quality are legitimate,” he is acknowledging an opposing argument. At this point, he does not refute this argument in which he should have done. This makes him lose his power in persuasion. Though Smith remains unsupported to his assertion at some point in paragraph 3 and 7, Smith’s article is effective in using facts, examples, appeal to the emotions, logical organization, and stylistic techniques to convince his audience.
Being in front of this challenge students try to work harder in order to succeed. In the article, Sherry uses pieces of evidence from her personal experience and examples to support her thesis. Also, her article is well-organized, and Sherry uses an academic language. However, Sherry do not consider many aspects that might affect students. She gives to much importance the example that she gives with her son.
The Smarthinking program offers assistance in areas that majority of adult students may struggle in such as creating a essay. Since I’ve been out of school for almost 20 years I’ve struggled with creating a successful essay. I didn’t understand why we needed to prepare to tell a story. However I learned that college was much more then just writing or telling a story. It requires you to have organization starting with a topic introduction, thesis statement, main ideas and closing statement so that your audience can have a clear understanding of the message your giving.
As a College freshman in his second semester, I have learned to deal with the challenges that I have to deal with peaceful, yet exhilarating moment when my mind engages with an author’s thoughts on a page. As John Dewey states “Education is not preparation for life; education is life itself.” What Dewey insists is from my early days in high school to my first year in college as a freshman, I wanted to know the full concept of English; however, I have now realized this subject would fill in my void of English with noteworthy complexities. This was not the case for most of my second semester in Montgomery College; I always had trouble in various parts of the subject, such as development in thesis statement, sentence writing and reflecting on previous essays. Writing a thesis statement had been one of my down falls in English.
I took the time to write out an outline for this essay to help manage the chaos that is my writing, unlike my other essays for the course. As I said before, I have learned to question the structure of my paragraphs. For example: when I was revising the Composing Process essay, I noticed that a set of paragraphs could be rearranged and partially rewritten to improve the structure and make the essay flow better. However, I would argue that my Justification video assignment demonstrates my assertion better than my revised essays. From the beginning, I laid out a clear path that my Justification video needed to follow.
This time I have connected the paragraphs together. I had a better thesis statement. I had good topic sentences in each paragraph. The topic sentences were connected to the thesis. I had also used quotes better after using quotes I have cited them properly and explained the quote better.
Position statement: For college Should I or should I not, that is the decision we all encounter when we finally reach high school. Now, there are many factors that will affect a person’s life. The most important of these factors is whether or not one has a college degree. Through out this essay I will discuss why I believe that it would be advantageous for students to continue their education in college. I believe this because the unemployment rate (proven by FRED) among high school graduates is incredibly much higher than people that have graduated from college.
